Not That Anyone Cares But...

[trialbyerror]

N T A B C B
I got mail from my alter-ego Stefanus

Now Stefanus is everything I'm not...

Firstly, he's not that bright, but he is a good looking lad.
Also, he's not old.... Quite young.... Round 18 or so.

Born on a remote farm in the North Western Cape, he's a typical strong limbed farm boy

Aparantly, he has been staying at his cousin Kubus, his closest relative, who lives some 80Km away...

Anyhow, seems his Uncle Willem get's cramps in his legs, and uses wintergreen ointment to break the cramps, something new to Stefanus.

Well, according to stefanus, He woke up one night with the most painfull cramp right in his poepall (bum).

Seems his sphinter went into spasm. Now having learnt that Wintergreen takes cramps away, he hobbled to the medicine cupboard, got the stuff, went back to his room, lay down on his back, threw his sun bronzed farm-boy legs over his head and proceeded to smear a healthy handfull of the stuff on his poepall (bum) :eek:

Apparantly, that's when the kak hit the fan big time

He made the farm dam, about 400m away in about 12 seconds, and when that didn't help, ( water does not really help in these matters),

his next stop was the chicken coop, where he plucked 3 dozen chickens in as many seconds.

Oom Hannes from the farm next door who heard the commotion, called for the police on the community telephone, but got his long and short rings confused and got the dominee (local parish priest) instead

In his anxiety, he didn't quite get things correct and shrieked into the community phone "Die fokken kak die fan strike op die plaas lanksaan"

(Directly translated the f***en shit's hit the fan on the farm next door), then put the phone down.

So the minister assumed that old Hendrik, who lived next to him (the minister) was in trouble, and sent the police racing there in there donkey-cart.

Now while this very slow donkey was plodding to old Hendrik, Wessels, the policeman was very surprized to see Stefanus overtake him, running butt naked, screaming "help me! help me"

He did take note that Stefanus's bum was bright red.... As he put it... Glowing like a red traffic light...

Anyhow, that's why Stefanus wrote me, He want's to come and stay with me till all of this gemors (mess) is sorted out and the 36 chickens have re-feathered....

What you all think? Should I let him come and stay?

He hasn't a clue that I'm gay, and besides, being good looking, with strong farm-boy legs and still a virgin, who knows what might happen....

Like I said he's everything I'm not