To date or not to date

[pellaz]

... My last BF in USA just kind of happened ... was never really in love with him ... The BF before that time I left after he abused me physically ... I tend to push away the guys that I truly like because I feel incomplete as a person and feel that I do not deserve them .. at the same point I am tired of being alone.

i think you know all about how you must love your self before thinking to date some one. I see you in fact respect your self because you left a physically abusive situation. So kinda confusing??

So how do you hate your self that you feel your "do not deserve them". there must be some self hate? Any ways most likely i am reading into this too much.

You have to be realistic up front tho, because immigration laws are harsh.
Its exciting to find a friend+ in a foreign country because you will learn so much more very quickly. Intimacy is a great incentive to learn the whole culture.