10-06-2012, 07:00 PM
You are insecure about your weight because you have been the butt end of many jokes. you are also insecure because society paints this 'bad' image of what beauty is. The guys on the 'Stud of the day' thread - they are the media whores idea of perfection, few are really ideal mates for real people.
In fact that thread is a good place to go to see the programming of the gay mind as to what 'stud' means. Shaved bodies, six packs, muscle and tone and nearly every single one of them is a 'baby' (well under 40 years of age). That is the media programing about masculinity and manhood. It happens to women as well, you know skeletal bodies, silicon injected breasts - women who may 'look nice' but do not have enough body fat to insure the survival of their offspring... ew.
The reality is that no matter how much weight you lose, you will have insecurities about your own personal 'physical fitness' in the eyes of others. That damage is already done - and I fear that you may be going down a path where you will continually feel fat when in fact you are fit but always be worried about the cupcakes, ice-screams and other tasty treats and always see a fat man in the mirror.
One mistake people make is using the scales (weight alone) to judge fitness.
Arnold Schwarzenegger stood around 6'1 and weighed in at around 250lbs (off season weight) would anyone call him fat?
According to BMI charts he was obese... Was he really?
No - why? because the majority of that weight was in the for of muscle.
What matters is body fat percentage. If you have a layer of padding over muscle, then changes are you may be 'fit'.
I would strongly suggest you get a body fat weigh in done (find out your body fat percentage). I think the most effective and most accurate is the displacement measuring where they weight you in dry land, then weigh you in a pool of water. How much you float can be calculated to how much fat to muscle mass you have. Fat floats, muscle sinks.
If this guy is interested in you already, then you 'won' - Losing weight may not be a high priority in his mind. Least ways not for 'good looks'. Health concerns he may have yes - but that depends on on how fit you really are.
There are guys in the world who like men with extra padding... and hairy torsos, and bald, and all of the other things mainstream media paints as 'not good looking'.
In fact that thread is a good place to go to see the programming of the gay mind as to what 'stud' means. Shaved bodies, six packs, muscle and tone and nearly every single one of them is a 'baby' (well under 40 years of age). That is the media programing about masculinity and manhood. It happens to women as well, you know skeletal bodies, silicon injected breasts - women who may 'look nice' but do not have enough body fat to insure the survival of their offspring... ew.
The reality is that no matter how much weight you lose, you will have insecurities about your own personal 'physical fitness' in the eyes of others. That damage is already done - and I fear that you may be going down a path where you will continually feel fat when in fact you are fit but always be worried about the cupcakes, ice-screams and other tasty treats and always see a fat man in the mirror.
One mistake people make is using the scales (weight alone) to judge fitness.
Arnold Schwarzenegger stood around 6'1 and weighed in at around 250lbs (off season weight) would anyone call him fat?
According to BMI charts he was obese... Was he really?
No - why? because the majority of that weight was in the for of muscle.
What matters is body fat percentage. If you have a layer of padding over muscle, then changes are you may be 'fit'.
I would strongly suggest you get a body fat weigh in done (find out your body fat percentage). I think the most effective and most accurate is the displacement measuring where they weight you in dry land, then weigh you in a pool of water. How much you float can be calculated to how much fat to muscle mass you have. Fat floats, muscle sinks.
If this guy is interested in you already, then you 'won' - Losing weight may not be a high priority in his mind. Least ways not for 'good looks'. Health concerns he may have yes - but that depends on on how fit you really are.
There are guys in the world who like men with extra padding... and hairy torsos, and bald, and all of the other things mainstream media paints as 'not good looking'.
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