I know what I am gonna have to do

[driftwood]

You may have failed at some things. You may even have failed at many things. But I don't think you can call yourself "a failure" after learning to speak, read and write Mandarin Chinese, and do it well enough that you were asked to translate documents into English. You need to take your entire self into consideration before passing blanket judgements on yourself. You also said in another post that you have other interests. I suspect other accomplishments. Lets hear about some of them.