What's on Your Mind

[InbetweenDreams]

What's on my mind? The fact i was threatened at work today and not one level of management gives and tiny piece of shit. I freely admit i am not one bit perfect but when you get ignored by everyone you turn to it is hurtful, "friends" setting you up with someone who texts for a while then ignores you for no clear reason then that friend buffs you off when you mention it. Why should i bother with them anymore? Management ho know you can not get in work yet still rota you in and then wont help with costs which travel as cost me more than i earned in my shift and tell me its my fault even thought they know there is me and another guy with no car they should realise before they rota us in. If you do something wrong they come down on you like a big weight but if they do its hush hush. The fact people you work with think they can joke about your sexuality then claim it is a joke. The fact you are made to feel like a child as you cannot say anything back or risk your employment, you do extra things that are not even considered helpful they just snide at you. 99% of workers are backstabbers, i mean i have witnessed things in that place that could risk so many jobs yet i have stayed quiet. You mention one thing and everyone in the company knows. Why would a guy text me on the advice of a "friend" who is ok in my opinion and trustworthy, why would they suddenly stop texting when nothing fully as been said above small talk. I dont know how much more i can actually take of the same things happening with everyone, i feel i have actually given up on life and this world and people. I cant try no more, im just too tired, why i am typing and posting this i have no clue as no one can help and no one cares or should care for that matter. I just cant trust anyone anymore,

I once worked at a computer repair shop, worked there for 5 years. I was constantly bullied by the owner and had to basically stand there and kiss his ass. We would argue and fight and he would just demonize me, the guy was an idiot to boot. I would have to use my own car to drive out to service calls and had to "remind" him to repay me for gas and so on -- forget getting mileage. I was underpaid, forced to work overtime without getting overtime pay. He'd yell and scream at me over nonsense and make a big deal about dumb shit. He did it to anyone who worked there. I couldn't trust him. He once demanded that he see my MySpace page (yeah we're going back a good bit) because a debt collector called him claiming how can he afford to pay me $30k/year (Which I didn't, I made $8/hr there) and he can't pay his bills or whatever the deal was. So I had no choice, I had to give him my password and he of course looked at everything I had been posting, that's how he found out I was gay and whatever else was on there. It was terrible. But you know what I quit, I became self employed, did my own computer repair for a while and took some of his business with me.

The point is, don't get discouraged by this crap. Got to roll with the punches and I have no idea what kind of labor laws there are in the UK but I'm sure there have to be better places to work. Try to stay out of the workplace drama, that shit will eat you alive. I worked at a resort for a couple of years and fuck an a the drama in that place it was like a damn soap opera... so and so did this and that, the owners are going to sell the property and we're all going to get axed... The rumors were insane...so damn dismal.. In hindsight I can't see how a group of people could be so dismal about their jobs thinking any minute the doors are going to close. Anyway, sorry for the rant, just do the best you can at keeping your head up and look for another job. Me personally though I try to keep my sexuality to myself except for people I know are cool with it. I am pleased to say though that where I work now, people are very accepting, in the next office over we have an instructor who is transgender... No one really even jokes about it... I mean you'd think a guy who trans-gendered to a woman who is in their 60's and had the deepest male voice would have all the jokes in the world about them but it's not the case.

Anyway, don't let this stuff get you down. Take care.