The beauty of men

[Sylph]

Thank you. I am happy to have found him as well. I hope things will work out, because he's becoming dear to me. The more I spend time with him, the more I realize just how amazing he is. But there are some things about it I can't rush, and have to be more patient with. So, I'll have to tame myself a little bit, at the same time.


[MENTION=15656]Sylph[/MENTION], I wanted to add something, not sure how relevant, but it is something I need to get out --- part of my problem with it is that whereas I am great at being in touch with myself and my feelings, and great at verbalizing them, I am bad at showing actual emotion. And part of the fault is that, words and speech do not feel real to me. Even though I know that what I am saying is true, they are not real because I am not really ''proving'' (to use such a word) that I feel any of it. Words are less real than actions. And I can safely say everything, the most private and delicate things about myself and my emotions, while never putting myself out there in reality, because while I say what I feel, I don't show what I feel. And that leaves me invulnerable, intact. To do the other thing, to show my feelings, that's the hardest part.

I'm not saying I don't want to do it (I already went through that phase of denial in my youth), because I have realized that I do want it -- very much -- but I just don't know how to do it and/or how to be comfortable with it.

Simply do it.

Thinking about it and what you can and cannot do, won't actually get you to do anything.


My philosophy on life has always been, just do whatever the fuck you want, just respect people and follow the law.

I do and say exactly what I want, how I am feeling, thinking and so forth.

Very rarely do I think about anxieties or what-ifs.
I have little regrets.

I'm an open book, obnoxiously loud and altruistic to a fault.


And I just do it.


Many people cannot and some people will even dislike you for it, but you can't please everyone and must simply live in your own light and hold all others to the wayside.


I really have no method or trick to what you want to achieve, but simply advice that you not be in your head so much, cause your obvious doubt will always inhibit you and will shine transparently unto the person you seek to enamour.