Why does lust turn guys into idiots?

[meridannight]

I guess we're just fooling ourselves then? Or to put it more exacting, we're slaves to hormones that make us feel in love with someone, yet I could write a fucking book about how I feel about someone in detail. Of course I have to wonder how much about how I feel is utter nonsense and how much is truthful. You cannot be objective when you're "in love," I think that is for certain. However, I think in one way or another we're very much at the mercy of hormones, chemicals and electrical impulses. I don't feel that we're only a fancy chemistry set. Takes the humanity out of the equation.

I don't agree. I think what we feel for a man we are in love with is the truth, if not the only truth in the world.

Who says our judgmental skills are to be preferred over our emotional reactions anyway? Rational thought is just as much at the mercy of chemistry and hormones in our brain, as emotions are. Just because we are rendered less critical of men we fall in love with, does not make our emotions illegitimate. It just brings the emotions into focus. I could just as easily claim, that the reason I am critical of strangers and people I don't care about, is because I don't react emotionally to them. Caring is an emotional quality, not something you can do through rational reasoning. And it's something that happens only with select people, not with everyone. So which is more valuable -- cold rationality you possess with most everyone, or rare emotional reaction elicited only toward specific individuals?

Who says the man who loves another does not see his partner more genuinely than those other people who look at him through rational criticism? If all of us went looking for a partner through complete rationalization alone, we'd all end up unhappy. I don't need a guy who earns enough money, bathes a certain number of times a week, and has an IQ score of at least 140 to qualify to be my partner. I need a man I feel connected to, am physically attracted to, care about, and love, to be my partner.


As much as I am a man of science and reason, I value my relationships with men above any benefits of my intellect. Not saying I'd prefer to be stupider, but with the intelligence I do have, emotions still rank higher to me. Intelligence is for free, and it's not going anywhere; emotional connection with another man, however, is more rare, delicate and more precious, not something you get so easily. And, that emotional connection is more interesting and fascinating than quantum mechanics and Philip of Macedon's battle tactics combined. And it also makes me feel more satisfied/fulfilled than quantum mechanics.

The things I feel for other men -- I'd give everything, every object of material value that I own, before I relinquish my connection to men. Because that is the best I have felt in this life. Not even the high from cocaine is comparable to it, and cocaine is pretty powerful in itself. And while I can't claim that what I feel for men comes from rationality, this evaluation on the quality of my feelings and connection to them does.


What is more interesting to me, and what this study raises as a question, is whether those men who have significantly above average intelligence, have a harder time switching off their rational parts, and harder time connecting emotionally with other people. I've never really looked into it well, but it's an interesting question. Even though I don't necessarily think there should be such a correlation (rather a dysfunction in the emotional regulation in the brain, maybe).

PS. I'd like to hear where [MENTION=21558]Emiliano[/MENTION] stands on this topic. Care to pitch in?