Fobo

[InbetweenDreams]

Well I think my biggest problem is that I think too much and worry too much. I internalize everything and then I guess feel like everything that goes wrong is my fault, or a fault of mine.

I don't know why I dwell on "wanting a bf" perhaps it is having all these dating apps and seeing photos of other couples being happy, having kids, being further along in their life than I am. However, I don't know that it is so much that I need a bf, maybe a partner in crime sort to speak. I have friends but it isn't all of what I need, it is more like hang out and drink kind of friends. I can't talk to anyone about things I like, interested in, my other hobbies....Not too many people really get it about amateur radio or programming or any of that...


Also, venting about things on GS is nice...but maybe not the best way to deal with things either.

Eh you're right though. A guy could tell me to grab his ass and I would be like..."Are you sure?" lol

I've always been like that though, I'm bad about making moves like that, not saying I haven't made the first move. Part of me wants to, the other part of me doesn't want the other guy thinking that I think of him being a slab of meat either.... unless that is the sole purpose. I don't know, just have had so many bad experiences with guys.

The only other thing I can think of doing is trying anxiety/depression meds again. Or maybe try going back to the gym, which I have been paying for but not using. Maybe just need to get into the swing of things...