Hi there

[baristajedi]

Thanks for sharing. A follow-up question please: when you came out as gay to your husband and he responded with anger, were you understanding of that?

Yes, I was, for a long time.

But, there were also some things I felt anger about with him. He wasn't very supportive or communicative, never tried to do an equal part in housework or with our daughter. I begged him for years to work on our relationship, he could see I was in pain and not happy; and it angered me that he thought our marriage was "great" and I was "destroying everything", so my patience wore thin after a while.

Also, he was very invalidating about me coming out. I know that was out of pain and hurt and denial so i tried to be understanding about that as well, but it took a toll on me and I also lost patience after time passed.


I was very aware of how much pain i brought on him and I made mistakes in how I dealt with his responses, and I also did some things with a good deal of compassion. It was a mix of right and wrong I suppose.