06-04-2017, 08:59 PM
That's why I love this forum! Thanks guys for some very genuine advice! :-)
[MENTION=20941]Camfer[/MENTION], this is very true. I can't just wash away 10 years, so yeah, I need to really process the situation with my wife.
[MENTION=1766]princealbertofb[/MENTION], some very sound advice too. I think you're right I don't want to go from one marriage straight in to another! What you said about it being about more than my frame, made me think, that's the biggest negative with this guy. He is attracted to certain types of guy- he pointed out a guy on tv that he thought was very feminine and that he could never go with a guy like that. I said that I found the guy really attractive and that I don't agree with a narrow definition of masculinity. My wife has always said that I can be a bit camp at times, but that's because I'm so comfortable around her. Guess what I'm saying is Ill be damned if I will go from a closeted queer guy playing it straight to an out queer guy playing it straight. So maybe I do need to meet different guys, work out who I am too in relation to this part of my being. Maybe I will talk more with my friend in time about that.
@Cridders, that is very true, as mates there is no pressure, I do like him and would hate to get into a relationship, if it went wrong I'd hate lose a mate. I've had plenty of experience of this with female mates and, yeah, I will pause for thought.
In terms of moving out. That's one for the future. We need to sort our finances, and in all good conscience, I couldn't leave too soon, my boys are very young and, as kids do, play up a lot! Sarah is tired enough and if I wasn't here, at the moment, I think that could get worse as they will run her ragged! So as much as I'd love my little studio flat overlooking the Atlantic *sigh* that will have to wait! :-)
Cheers guys,
Stu
[MENTION=20941]Camfer[/MENTION], this is very true. I can't just wash away 10 years, so yeah, I need to really process the situation with my wife.
[MENTION=1766]princealbertofb[/MENTION], some very sound advice too. I think you're right I don't want to go from one marriage straight in to another! What you said about it being about more than my frame, made me think, that's the biggest negative with this guy. He is attracted to certain types of guy- he pointed out a guy on tv that he thought was very feminine and that he could never go with a guy like that. I said that I found the guy really attractive and that I don't agree with a narrow definition of masculinity. My wife has always said that I can be a bit camp at times, but that's because I'm so comfortable around her. Guess what I'm saying is Ill be damned if I will go from a closeted queer guy playing it straight to an out queer guy playing it straight. So maybe I do need to meet different guys, work out who I am too in relation to this part of my being. Maybe I will talk more with my friend in time about that.
@Cridders, that is very true, as mates there is no pressure, I do like him and would hate to get into a relationship, if it went wrong I'd hate lose a mate. I've had plenty of experience of this with female mates and, yeah, I will pause for thought.
In terms of moving out. That's one for the future. We need to sort our finances, and in all good conscience, I couldn't leave too soon, my boys are very young and, as kids do, play up a lot! Sarah is tired enough and if I wasn't here, at the moment, I think that could get worse as they will run her ragged! So as much as I'd love my little studio flat overlooking the Atlantic *sigh* that will have to wait! :-)
Cheers guys,
Stu
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
