Buying Junk

[InbetweenDreams]

That's what I'm afraid of. He does like to go antiquing, in addition to cars he likes to buy old radios, clocks and whatnot. Which in itself is fine, but he does have probably 50 vintage clocks hanging on the wall. He also buys old console stereos from the 60's and 70's. So much that his stuff has accumulated in his parent's house. I have to walk sideways to get down the hall, mind you his parent's house isn't dirty or anything, just very cluttered with antiques and such. It worries me that this would continue in a serious relationship as I don't want to have 15 cars that don't run or him making choices like this that can clearly cause financial problems.

He does see that I am trying to be helpful on these issues, like the job issue. I think he knows he should look for another job but I believe he hides behind the anxiety and chooses not too. Won't even get on Indeed to just see what's around. The boss at his workplace is shorthanded and even said "you guys aren't going to quit are you?" and told him he should hit them up for a raise but he won't....he's too scared. I want to help him with this sort of stuff but I don't know that I can... Can I bring awareness to this stuff sure but some of this has to come from him.

170 miles is a long long drive. We try to see each other twice a month and take turns on a monthly basis, that's how it's been so far. It doesn't bother me so much to make the drive but I don't really like staying over there due to the clutter and with all the cats (they have 9 cats) and odors from all the old radios and whatnot it just kills my sinuses which I normally don't have problems with.

I do think the unfulfillment is due to not being able to see each other enough, this is a common issue with dating in the boonies. It does seem that he doesn't have much to say in general. I'll ask a question like what kind of food do you like and he'll reply with "ugh....I don't know" and be really general with everything. Similarly I have had issues getting out of him what he wants to do. Back on Valentine's Day I booked us a room in a touristy town thinking he might want to go to the shops and such since he likes antiquing...Since he never gave me any input I made all the choices on what to do then he doesn't want to do what I have planned. That stuff gets on my nerves. I can be indecisive myself, so it is a little bit of the pot calling the kettle black sort of.

Lastly, I already made plans with him in July to go to the beach and so forth. He's already paid his half. Part of me is thinking I should give him back his money and just go alone (again). I feel like I know that this is not going to work out between us in the long term. I would like to be wrong, I'd like to get serious with him but I don't see how it can be successful with what I am seeing. Definitely things I have to think on and try to work out with him.