Anti-Depressants

[InbetweenDreams]

Having "self-medicated" xanax definitely not a fan of the benzodiazepine family of drugs and damn they sure do work in the short term but there's hell to pay coming off. Also, obvious point, don't self-medicate. I was lucky that the withdrawal effects weren't worse, of course hindsight is 20/20.

The "flatter emotions" is something I'm a bit at odds with. I do want to still feel and all, just want to get rid of that constant "overcast" and dreary feeling and the thoughts that seems to follow. I know that being aware of your thoughts and taking control and all that is the same way you can hold off anxiety, but being depressed seems to be a bit more difficult. Kind of like barring the door and someone has a battering ram, eventually they'll get in. I don't know, it is difficult to describe. Plus, anxiety.... I have pretty bad social anxiety. I have come a long way from where I've been but I still hate doing a lot of "normal" things, I just push through it. Things like going to restaurants, shopping.... any places that's crowded or having to socialize with people I don't know. I just avoid it. I don't really know how any of these drugs are at changing how you feel in these situations.

I did hear that there is a DNA test that is supposed to help determine which of the drugs out there are likely to be most effective. Not sure how accurate that is, never had that test suggested in the past, but in 2014 I also didn't have insurance either.