10-23-2010, 07:09 PM
As I mentioned in your other thread, you have come to grips with telling yourself that you might be gay... you've not worded it that way on your profile yet; you may do so some day.
I don't think Bowyn is totally right in asking those "what do you want, what do you need?" questions because in the word WANT you have to remember that WANTING originally meant LACKING something. So possibly your life LACKS that presence or experience of a man in a loving relationship. What you NEED would mean roughly the same thing, I guess. "What do you WISH or HOPE for?" might be a different way to word the question.
My partner, Marshlander, has acknowledged here that you are probably in a time and stage of your life when you are unable to answer whether you want or need these things, but they appear to be lacking, in any case.
The question would be more to do with how urgent it is for you to fulfil this fantasy.
How desperate are you to end your current relationship?
Do you even WANT to end your current relationship (with your wife)?
Do you think it would be unfair to 'cheat' on her, if you did have a affair with a man?
Would she understand that she, as a female, cannot fulfil that part of your sex life and fantasy?
If you could clarify some of these questions for yourself, (and for us) you might be able to start taking action on some of them.
Remember though, as Marshlander said here, it's a different thing getting a blow job from a stranger in a 'cottage' than getting it from a loving partner whom you intend to have a long-lasting relationship with. The latter is exquisite, the former a rather unstabilising experience after the initial thrill, as it might make you feel very rotten indeed, for letting yourself go down that road.
The road to finding such a partner may be a bit rough and daunting... but in my experience, worth every (measured) risk taken. Good luck with your quest.
I don't think Bowyn is totally right in asking those "what do you want, what do you need?" questions because in the word WANT you have to remember that WANTING originally meant LACKING something. So possibly your life LACKS that presence or experience of a man in a loving relationship. What you NEED would mean roughly the same thing, I guess. "What do you WISH or HOPE for?" might be a different way to word the question.
My partner, Marshlander, has acknowledged here that you are probably in a time and stage of your life when you are unable to answer whether you want or need these things, but they appear to be lacking, in any case.
The question would be more to do with how urgent it is for you to fulfil this fantasy.
How desperate are you to end your current relationship?
Do you even WANT to end your current relationship (with your wife)?
Do you think it would be unfair to 'cheat' on her, if you did have a affair with a man?
Would she understand that she, as a female, cannot fulfil that part of your sex life and fantasy?
If you could clarify some of these questions for yourself, (and for us) you might be able to start taking action on some of them.
Remember though, as Marshlander said here, it's a different thing getting a blow job from a stranger in a 'cottage' than getting it from a loving partner whom you intend to have a long-lasting relationship with. The latter is exquisite, the former a rather unstabilising experience after the initial thrill, as it might make you feel very rotten indeed, for letting yourself go down that road.
The road to finding such a partner may be a bit rough and daunting... but in my experience, worth every (measured) risk taken. Good luck with your quest.
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
