It's just too much...

[colinmackay]

Hello everyone! I'm hoping someone could possibly give me any advice on this issue I got myself into. So I'm in my very first relationship (over the internet) and it's been well over a month that we've been together. So during that time up to now my boyfriend will NOT stop talking about having sex with me. At first I refused to play along in his text sex plays, but like an ideot I caved in and played along in his "game". After about five times of "doing it" I got fed up and started refusing his "love". Now he's tring to act inteligent saying "Your not giving me enough 'attention'" and "It helps build a relationship". Although what he says is true he wants me to talk dirty with him all the time, and thats not who I am.

Only on rare occasions do we make actual conversations and thats the only time I enjoy talking to him. Ultimatly I'm not happy, but he definitly is. And I dont know whether to try to continue to talk him out of it, or cut the plug on this relationship.

Any comments will be greatly appreciated!

I've done the sexting (sex text) thing twice. Once with a guy I met via Grindr (never met in real life) and that didn't really do it for me at all. I think he spent more time having a wank than actually texting so I didn't really get a good mental picture.

The other time was with my boyfriend when we were apart one evening and that was actually pretty good. Not as good as the real thing, but it was nice enough. I think in that case we already knew each other and that helped build the mental images up.

Anyway, on to the comments he made: "Your not giving me enough 'attention'" and "It helps build a relationship".

Reads like emotional black mail to me, so long as you've made perfectly clear to him that these do nothing for you. However, if you've just been trying to ignore this and not say anything then that's passive aggressive on your part.

There are moments where you you find things are great. I don't think you have live just for those moments. If, for the most part, things are not right for you then maybe it is time you moved on.

Final word of advice, I tried lots of internet "dating" services. Gaydar, Grindr, Gay-Parship, etc. None of that actually worked for me. Of the few dates it produced they went from so-so down to bloody awful. It can work for some people, but it didn't for me. They are a numbers game and that gets tiring after a while. Ultimately, a real world encounter might work so much better. (I got introduced to my boyfriend through a friend. We hit it off rather well and nature took its course from then.)