Crisis of Conscience

[scnivles446]

Hi scnivles446,

I'm one of the people on here who was married for a long time and now I'm not. I am much happier in my present relationship and even though my partner and I are often separated by hundreds of miles for weeks at a time I have no problem keeping this relationship monogamous.

I will never be proud of myself for the way I behaved in my "previous life", but you might just project forward a few years. This feeling you have is not going to go way. Jacking off to gay porn is going to feed your curiosity as well as provide a quick release. I daresay she is hoping that not mentioning the issue means there is no pink elephant in the room with you.

My feeling is you are going to be driven to do it sometime. If the relationship is going to break up, would you prefer it to happen sooner or, perhaps, later when maybe you have dependent children too? Talking may be a good option, but in the end the decision has to be yours. I don't see any easy decisions ahead. Best wishes to you and your girl friend.

I guess I just hoped that she would be ok with it, I mean I would be fine with her doing the same thing as long as i was involved, but i dont know if she could cope with it. That being said i dont know how she will react. So you wouldn't advise going behind her back? I've been told buy a few guys (trying to pick me up mind you) that having a discrete boyfriend or 'buddy' may actually save my relationship, therefore it would be the right thing to do buy her. I'm not sure i'm capable of it anyway, i've tried and just couldn't go through with it.

Thank You for the kind words and advice. Its good to know others have been through this before.