Spoiled myself.

[Marvinteck]

I self identify as a loner. Im having some difficulty adjusting to having my friend back in the picture and in my bedroom. I have been spoiled by my own hand and watching to much porn in the process of getting off. My sexual response has grown accustomed to solo activities. My friend is finding out Im a hard person to please. When he goes down on me it feels good but I havent been able to climax.

I did some research online and now I feel like I have been hit by a mack truck. This is sorta hard to admit........... long story short I have watched so much porn while masturbating that real sex with a real person is not enough sexual stimuli for me to get hard much less get off.

The other night my friend and I had some alone time because my brother was out of the house. We watched a few XTube videos but I wasnt really fealing all that frisky. I knew he was turned on so I offered to go down on him and he accepted my offer. After I was finished with him he offered to return the favor and I accepted. I was taking to long to cum so he gave up after awhile. He hopped on my computer (which is right next to my bed) while I remained on the bed to finish myself off. I went at it for awhile and my friend remarked "Cant believe you havent cum yet". He was online flipping through some more porn vids and he clicked on one that had some passionate moaning by the girl. I couldn't see the screen but my pleasure went way up. He clicked on another vid with poor quality audio thirty seconds after that and my pleasure went way down. I was eventually able to finish. A light bulb went off in my head but wasnt quite sure why at the time.

I have been celibate for the past eleven years with porn and solo activities as my only sexual outlet. For the past three years I have been using online porn pretty heavily to get off with. I have had problems with erectile dysfunction on and off in the past. I overcame that by watching more hardcore and new videos online. I am able to climax without watching porn but it takes allot longer and doesn't feel nearly as good.

The next day after that light bulb went off I Googled "Cant cum without watching porn" and found out I am not the only one with this problem. i did some more research and stumbled across a site called:

http://www.yourbrainonporn.com

The puzzle pieces fell into place and that light bulb got bright as the sun. My innocent pursuit of solo pleasure turned into a addiction to porn without me knowing it at the time. It also contributed to my erectile dysfunction problems I have been struggling with on and off. My brain has adapted so much to watching porn to get off that its nearly impossible to get off any other route.

The solution to this problem has me quite depressed and upset. Allegedly the only way to solve the problem is to abstain from any sexual stimuli for at least three months. That means no porn, no masturbation and no orgasms. That allows the brains pleasure centers to return to default so the person is able to get sexually aroused by normal stimuli vs watching hardcore porn to get off. I am feeling quite depressed, ashamed and lonely at the moment. Unfortunately all this didnt come to light till my friend and I started fooling around again recently when he moved down. I have no idea what I am going to tell him.

Y'all might think Im crazy or that Im over thinking this but it made perfect sense to me once I started piecing the puzzle pieces together. I could be way off but I have to try something to fix my problem.:frown: