09-18-2011, 05:58 AM
UPDATE:
I still havent talked to my friend about my concerns. We havent done any fooling around in the last two weeks. He hasn't been persuing me and I havent been persuing him. Unless he pushes the issue I may just let sleeping dogs lie. Sometimes close friends are just suppose to be close friends and nothing more than that. As it stands at the moment his behavior is a bit too straight for my taste. The more that we hang out the more that my friend makes it clear that he would be much happier with a girl vs a guy in his life. From what I gather all he wants is clandestine NSA sex. That may be a good scenario for some people but I don't see it working in my case. Back when we were teens we hid what we were doing behind closed doors at night. We had to be really secretive by sneaking around and be extra quiet while we were doing our thing so his family wouldn't find out. I came out of the closet last year for a reason and I have moved past the days in my life where I feel the need to hide myself. We are two adults in our late twenties who should be able to freely express ourselves without having to hide in the closet like we are teens again afraid his family might hear us. The fact that I am unable to gain any physical satisfaction from the arrangement has a part in my decision to let sleeping dogs lie for the moment.
As for the issue of porn addiction I am still doing research and have only told one close friend online about what is going on. I tried quitting and after a week I was back viewing it again. My friends and family are oblivious about my online habits.
I do have some feelings for him since we are close friends however I haven't fallen for him yet. My feelings are more like feelings of close friendship than love and romance. I think would be quite foolish to allow myself completely fall for him and get my hopes up when his actions dictate he isn't interested in me like that.
I still havent talked to my friend about my concerns. We havent done any fooling around in the last two weeks. He hasn't been persuing me and I havent been persuing him. Unless he pushes the issue I may just let sleeping dogs lie. Sometimes close friends are just suppose to be close friends and nothing more than that. As it stands at the moment his behavior is a bit too straight for my taste. The more that we hang out the more that my friend makes it clear that he would be much happier with a girl vs a guy in his life. From what I gather all he wants is clandestine NSA sex. That may be a good scenario for some people but I don't see it working in my case. Back when we were teens we hid what we were doing behind closed doors at night. We had to be really secretive by sneaking around and be extra quiet while we were doing our thing so his family wouldn't find out. I came out of the closet last year for a reason and I have moved past the days in my life where I feel the need to hide myself. We are two adults in our late twenties who should be able to freely express ourselves without having to hide in the closet like we are teens again afraid his family might hear us. The fact that I am unable to gain any physical satisfaction from the arrangement has a part in my decision to let sleeping dogs lie for the moment.
As for the issue of porn addiction I am still doing research and have only told one close friend online about what is going on. I tried quitting and after a week I was back viewing it again. My friends and family are oblivious about my online habits.
trywait Wrote:except u've fallen for him....
I do have some feelings for him since we are close friends however I haven't fallen for him yet. My feelings are more like feelings of close friendship than love and romance. I think would be quite foolish to allow myself completely fall for him and get my hopes up when his actions dictate he isn't interested in me like that.
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