11-23-2011, 04:54 AM
Why use the "'Q-word" to self-identify? Has it not occurred to you that there are gay men who can not help but find this word devastating? Must we encounter it wherever in The Community we go? Does this seem fair?
To be sure, everyone has the right to self-identify, but I object to either the use of this specific term, or alternatively the way it is handled by The Community and the Media. I object to this term on the grounds it is unnecessarily hurtful. Another term could be coined that has the advantage of being more inclusive without being offensive because of prior use. If what is sought is just a means of self-identification that is inclusive of L,G,B,T,etc... without having to say a lot of words or letters, then find a word that isn't unavoidably hurtful and exclusive. I mean exclusive in the sense that I can't go to a GLBT community center without encountering the hurtful Q. So for my health and safety I must stay home. I can not watch t.v. for because of shows like "Queer Eye...," channels where the word is used constantly like Bravo, and even Rachel Maddow on the gay-friendlier news uses it. So I watch no t.v.. Not entirely a bad thing there, perhaps but beside the point. I can't listen to the radio, of course, because it is every other word on Pacifica (KPFB in Berkeley). And of course I have encountered it here, but I was expecting that and tolerating it for various reasons.
On the other hand, the purpose in the use of such language may be to "take it back," and if that is what The Community was doing by embracing the language, I would be all for it. But that is not what is accomplished here. Let me tell you; when I was a kid the "N" word was used a lot and that made me cringe also. Then blacks started using it in a militant way. When they said it, I heard "you use this word, Whitey, and I'll kill you!" Now few people use it and everybody is ashamed of it. That is taking back the language. What The Community is doing, instead is frivolously, thoughtlessly doing is making it cool for everyone to use it. It is unfair, and it is ageist, in the sense that everybody I know of who has voiced complaint has been older. Not all old people object, but I have met no young people who do.
So I'm pissing in the wind because The Community is heartbreakingly self-destructive and ageist. The youth always carry the field here, because the old just aren't beautiful enough, I suppose.
To be sure, everyone has the right to self-identify, but I object to either the use of this specific term, or alternatively the way it is handled by The Community and the Media. I object to this term on the grounds it is unnecessarily hurtful. Another term could be coined that has the advantage of being more inclusive without being offensive because of prior use. If what is sought is just a means of self-identification that is inclusive of L,G,B,T,etc... without having to say a lot of words or letters, then find a word that isn't unavoidably hurtful and exclusive. I mean exclusive in the sense that I can't go to a GLBT community center without encountering the hurtful Q. So for my health and safety I must stay home. I can not watch t.v. for because of shows like "Queer Eye...," channels where the word is used constantly like Bravo, and even Rachel Maddow on the gay-friendlier news uses it. So I watch no t.v.. Not entirely a bad thing there, perhaps but beside the point. I can't listen to the radio, of course, because it is every other word on Pacifica (KPFB in Berkeley). And of course I have encountered it here, but I was expecting that and tolerating it for various reasons.
On the other hand, the purpose in the use of such language may be to "take it back," and if that is what The Community was doing by embracing the language, I would be all for it. But that is not what is accomplished here. Let me tell you; when I was a kid the "N" word was used a lot and that made me cringe also. Then blacks started using it in a militant way. When they said it, I heard "you use this word, Whitey, and I'll kill you!" Now few people use it and everybody is ashamed of it. That is taking back the language. What The Community is doing, instead is frivolously, thoughtlessly doing is making it cool for everyone to use it. It is unfair, and it is ageist, in the sense that everybody I know of who has voiced complaint has been older. Not all old people object, but I have met no young people who do.
So I'm pissing in the wind because The Community is heartbreakingly self-destructive and ageist. The youth always carry the field here, because the old just aren't beautiful enough, I suppose.
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