A bit lost

[pellaz]

... I am a 25 yr old guy

Your still very young with lots of time to over come a few mistakes. Just make them a learning thing. Balance this with the next statement.

... I am a good and caring person at heart but I cheated on my bf with an old friend about two months ago. I told my bf about it because I really could not base a relationship on a lie. He says he has forgiven me and that we are starting anew. However, I can't seem to forgive myself ...

-Put things in perspective in that its a two way street. When your partner's behavior is not as expected be prepared to forgive him too.
-The latent bad is that it opens up a channel of mutual distrust between you two.

... Our relationship does have its flaws. All relationships do I suppose. I just find it hard not to be able to have an intellectually stimulating conversation with my partner and to share my interests with him.

-Just be sure the both of you bring something to the table. The sum of you's add up to more than just two.
-My partner is very different than i. I dated guys that shared common interests but did not seem to get along with them any better. Just me.

I am a 25 yr old guy from a small city in South Africa ...

something to consider; boy friends are difficult to find. And when found, we put sooo much effort into their up keep. Dont just toss this person the the curb. Talk it through with him. The local gay population has to be tiny in that small "S African town", let me guess a population of 2 citizens you & him so just be aware of what is perfectly good and how bad things could be. Stick it through for the short term, you will fee different in time.

... I have been struggling with my sexuality for years and really can't remember when last I could say that I was truly happy. ... I have been dating a guy for two years now and he has been my first serious bf. We are both largely out to our friends but our families are really a no go area. We both still live with our parents ( I am still studying but hoping to move out in the new year.)

-We all struggle with who we are but in the end its not important. It is how others see us; so be the best gay, bi or straight man you can be, pick one. Seems the current situation is the gay option. you, a partner and a bed seems to work for you as gay.
-"Things will get better" :confused: when you graduate and become our own person. I cant imagine not being totally out and having a two year old relationship. A situation where you cant even hold hands around your family. dont let this confuse the issue that you love him. Not smart to consider such grave thoughts when your environment is phucked, not optimal.
-an hour away is not big, you could see him every day. Try to skype.