12-11-2011, 01:31 PM
Thank you guys, I think all of you make some sense here...
It's true, two wrongs don't make a right, and I need to stop spying on him. "East" is right when he says that the spyware is a more grave violation of trust than the weed smoking, and that I need to stop it.
Nonetheless, I don't care so much about the fact that he smokes although we agreed we wouldn't, but more about the fact that he is lying about it persistently despite the fact that I have given him countless opportunities to come clean without me being mad or thinking about consequences...
Because I also agree with those of you who say that the occasional joint, as long as it does not affect his responsibilities or our relationship, is not the problem. I mean I used to smoke myself, so I'm not ex ante judging people smoking weed. The whole ban on weed for the two of us really only was agreed on because he couldn't use it responsibly anymore.
Do you guys think I should solve this by telling him that I see that he has improved and that I'm okay with it now as long as he keeps his responsibilities and is honest about it? And if yes, how should I deal with the fact that he kept it from me? Just accept that he lied and move on?
It's true, two wrongs don't make a right, and I need to stop spying on him. "East" is right when he says that the spyware is a more grave violation of trust than the weed smoking, and that I need to stop it.
Nonetheless, I don't care so much about the fact that he smokes although we agreed we wouldn't, but more about the fact that he is lying about it persistently despite the fact that I have given him countless opportunities to come clean without me being mad or thinking about consequences...
Because I also agree with those of you who say that the occasional joint, as long as it does not affect his responsibilities or our relationship, is not the problem. I mean I used to smoke myself, so I'm not ex ante judging people smoking weed. The whole ban on weed for the two of us really only was agreed on because he couldn't use it responsibly anymore.
Do you guys think I should solve this by telling him that I see that he has improved and that I'm okay with it now as long as he keeps his responsibilities and is honest about it? And if yes, how should I deal with the fact that he kept it from me? Just accept that he lied and move on?
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