12-23-2011, 04:21 AM
Hi Brandi,
Controlling relationships are hard set when we are dealing with adults. I will assume that she is around about your age (16) thus is in the process of learning where she is in life in relation to everyone else. She still has a few more years to 'grow out' of a lot of patterns.
If you were 26 I would say yes, definitely, this is a 'warning sign' or three.
However you are both still in the middle of puberty, are both caught between the place between childhood and adulthood that all of us consider to be hell on earth.
As such, I cannot say if this is a set pattern for life or if she is just pushing boundaries and trying to figure out her strengths/weaknesses and where she is at when it comes her place as 'adult'.
It is possible (I do not know if this is the case) that she is lagging behind in maturity and you are just a wee bit more mature, so it bothers you more.
However since it does bother you I would suggest you communicate with her that it does and why it does bother you that she has this contradictory standard were its ok for her to have friends while you are not allowed them. Her answers, her willingness to discuss the problems should give you a better idea where she is an how 'set' she is in her ways.
Controlling relationships are hard set when we are dealing with adults. I will assume that she is around about your age (16) thus is in the process of learning where she is in life in relation to everyone else. She still has a few more years to 'grow out' of a lot of patterns.
If you were 26 I would say yes, definitely, this is a 'warning sign' or three.
However you are both still in the middle of puberty, are both caught between the place between childhood and adulthood that all of us consider to be hell on earth.
As such, I cannot say if this is a set pattern for life or if she is just pushing boundaries and trying to figure out her strengths/weaknesses and where she is at when it comes her place as 'adult'.
It is possible (I do not know if this is the case) that she is lagging behind in maturity and you are just a wee bit more mature, so it bothers you more.
However since it does bother you I would suggest you communicate with her that it does and why it does bother you that she has this contradictory standard were its ok for her to have friends while you are not allowed them. Her answers, her willingness to discuss the problems should give you a better idea where she is an how 'set' she is in her ways.
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