Why don't I want to come out?

[pellaz]

... fear of being judged by new people I meet through the lens of ...

disclaimer:
dont let anyone do it for you, out your self. Carefully think it through what you need balanced against the safety first aspect. Everybody is sooo different.

In the end consider the fear of being judged by your self. When the self image thing is missing the target a you suffer needless depression and mood swings. You miss out on a lot of what life has to offer too because you have less confidence. For some people it dosnt matter as they have more than average self confidence, positive outlook.

Most family and close friends already know. When their best intentions are confused do you think they love you more? If friends are suspicious who you are they are likely to give their support. Who are you to think it even matters to most people other than they wonder what you are hiding?

Unless you are going to deprive your self all passion you will fall in love. Good luck being in the closet with a boy friend when you, not him, are afraid of being seen in public together. Men (gay or straight) are generally built like they are the stronger person if they are able to find a supportive relationship after they leave their mothers. Start your own live with the least house hold drama, keep things simple.