02-11-2012, 08:56 AM
Hi Anonymous,
I can't remember if you told us how long you have been living together with your gf. But I admit you sound like a married couple after sever or ten years. It seems that you are tired of keeping the relationship together, you are looking around, but you are not sure yet, if you have enough reasons to leave.
As A.B. pointed out, you talk about bills, a car, a place to live, even though you could have simply said: I love her. You see that she is not very happy, you know that the things she does are not right, but you try to make us see, that they are not as bad as it may sounds.
If you had kids, I would say work on that relationship as hard as you can, it can take years till it gets better, but you are not alone and you have some responsibility and you can't just think about your own well being and pleasure.
But in your case... I don't know. Because it CAN take years, trust me, I know. You can stay together because it is easier for both of you right now (you know the bills, the car...), but she should know about the arangement.
You wrote: I don't like the idea of starting over with someone new, of losing all the time and effort we both put in to this relationship. Makes it feel like it was all for nothing, and I hate that idea
I don't think that your main problem is looking for an experience with a guy. And I think your relationship was getting worse even before you started to have these ideas.
Your current relationship wasn't for nothing for sure. You spent time (probably years) with someone you loved/liked. Not all relationships need to lead to a marriage or to till death make us apart.
Maybe it's time to say goodbye.
p.s. I am sorry about my English.
I can't remember if you told us how long you have been living together with your gf. But I admit you sound like a married couple after sever or ten years. It seems that you are tired of keeping the relationship together, you are looking around, but you are not sure yet, if you have enough reasons to leave.
As A.B. pointed out, you talk about bills, a car, a place to live, even though you could have simply said: I love her. You see that she is not very happy, you know that the things she does are not right, but you try to make us see, that they are not as bad as it may sounds.
If you had kids, I would say work on that relationship as hard as you can, it can take years till it gets better, but you are not alone and you have some responsibility and you can't just think about your own well being and pleasure.
But in your case... I don't know. Because it CAN take years, trust me, I know. You can stay together because it is easier for both of you right now (you know the bills, the car...), but she should know about the arangement.
You wrote: I don't like the idea of starting over with someone new, of losing all the time and effort we both put in to this relationship. Makes it feel like it was all for nothing, and I hate that idea
I don't think that your main problem is looking for an experience with a guy. And I think your relationship was getting worse even before you started to have these ideas.
Your current relationship wasn't for nothing for sure. You spent time (probably years) with someone you loved/liked. Not all relationships need to lead to a marriage or to till death make us apart.
Maybe it's time to say goodbye.
p.s. I am sorry about my English.
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
