Tell Me Why Do You Love Yourself and What Makes You Special

[Jay]

I'll start first.

Let's talk about my leg.

I've mentioned about my leg in a different thread before but here we go again.

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I injured my left leg when I was around 11 years old. I fell downstairs and I didn't bother to tell my parents about it. I didn't seek for a medical treatment.

As a result, my left leg bends. Being morbid obese made it worse.

I had a problem to accept my left leg after I lost my weight. I mean, I almost reached 'perfection' but my perfection was destroyed by my bended leg.

My aunt once had a conversation with my mom in our living room. I just happened to be in our kitchen at the time.

She asked my mom if it's possible to get a treatment for my leg. "It's such a pity. He has a very nice look but with such ... leg."

Do you know how difficult for me to swallow that moment? It built regret, anger and self pity. I tried to pull, push and hit my leg with stuff hoping to straighten it out.

To make the situation more stressful, my office is located right opposite of high end boutiques like Prada, Gucci etc. Their salespersons look perfect from head to toe. Sometimes they would drop by to my office building to buy food at the cafeteria. I bumped into them once in a while.

I kept asking myself, "Why can't I look like them? They look perfect. Slender waist. Perfect height. Etc."

From 2009 - 2010, I did my best to avoid seeing myself from head to toe in a mirror. I was also scared and ashamed to walk in public by myself. But I forced myself to do so as I can't avoid the public.

In the end of 2010, I decided to make a change because I was getting sick of self pity and feeling bad about myself. I worked my butt off to lose weight and I will not let my injured leg to be the party pooper of my endless hard work.

One day I walked toward a mirror that reflects my whole body from head to toe. I pointed my right index finger to my own reflection and said, 'Fuc* you."

I never looked back ever since.

Nowadays I do my best to challenge and put my confidence to the test. I run every single day in public with my injured leg. I walk as much as possible in public.

If people stare at my leg, be my guest. They don't bother me.

I don't feel bad anymore. My injured left leg doesn't bother me anymore. In fact, my imperfection makes me feel so badass and hardcore. Running and climbing stairs from ground floor to the 30th floor everyday with an injured leg, man ... I feel so badass. Oh yeah, I feel sexy and I do know I am sexy. There, I said it.

Another thing. I'm still being approached by a lot of guys. Even though I have a so called crippled leg. So not bad, huh?

Confidence defeats all of your weaknesses.