Virgo
03-21-2012, 01:38 AM
I just came back from he website where I met this youngman, I decided to post the message here that I posted there so long ago, I think maybe it will let people know we all care, James
I miss my friend, a life cut too short thru ignorance and misunderstanding. Stevie was a special child, always more concerned with how others were than himself. Having found that he preferred boy's over girls, his family couldn't accept the way he was so they lashed out at him in anger and frustration. He was ridiculed and beaten not only by his father but by his older brother and his brothers friends. I found him reaching out to whoever would listen and accept who he was.
I spent many hours talking with him and found him bright, polite and full of compassion. I had grown up in similar circumstances and tried to help even though he wouldn't say where he was. He explained to me that he didn't want his dad or brother in trouble for something he caused. I explained to him that the way we felt inside was not something that we had chosen and that he needed to understand he was at least as good as everyone else but from what i could see even better.
we set up a time every evening to talk with each other and try to unload the problems of the day so that we could cope with tomorrow better not taking any of the previous days garbage into the next. By the time he turned 12 he had nicknamed me his INTERNET dad, saying often that he wished I had been his real dad. Everything seemed to be progressing and this bright light of a child seemed happier than he had been when I first meet him.
When he turned 13 and the full rush of hormones kicked in, he become a real handful. He talked about the boys he liked at school and the one in particular he felt drawn to. "Every time I see him my body trembles inside" was a very unique but I felt accurate description of what we all felt in those circumstances. Unknown to me he had acted on his feelings and got caught. The repercussions from those actions by his family were swift and merciless.
The monday before last my friend e-mailed me in the morning. He told me why I hadn't heard from him, that he had been severely beaten and not allowed near the computer as it was a bad influence on him. He told me that I had been his only true friend and that he loved me and wished that we were together. He told me that he didn't want to make any more mistakes, that what he put his family through had to stop. He apologized for not being able to help himself and that his feelings just overcame him and he had to act. He then said it wasn't my fault and that I was his best friend and not to feel bad. At the end of the message he told me to listen to "Don't stand at my grave and weep" by libera, "I love you always".
.Stevie, for you I played it for several hours after I im"d your computer and got an im back from your parents stating that you had taken your life. I am sorry that I couldn't help you, I miss you so much and as you pointed out in your message to me, my feelings have overcome me and I am still crying as I write you this one last message. I love you Stevie, I miss you, please God he may have taken his own life but I believe that no one in heaven would be worse off if you let him in, his compassion and selfless giving should at least get him a seat.
No mas
I miss my friend, a life cut too short thru ignorance and misunderstanding. Stevie was a special child, always more concerned with how others were than himself. Having found that he preferred boy's over girls, his family couldn't accept the way he was so they lashed out at him in anger and frustration. He was ridiculed and beaten not only by his father but by his older brother and his brothers friends. I found him reaching out to whoever would listen and accept who he was.
I spent many hours talking with him and found him bright, polite and full of compassion. I had grown up in similar circumstances and tried to help even though he wouldn't say where he was. He explained to me that he didn't want his dad or brother in trouble for something he caused. I explained to him that the way we felt inside was not something that we had chosen and that he needed to understand he was at least as good as everyone else but from what i could see even better.
we set up a time every evening to talk with each other and try to unload the problems of the day so that we could cope with tomorrow better not taking any of the previous days garbage into the next. By the time he turned 12 he had nicknamed me his INTERNET dad, saying often that he wished I had been his real dad. Everything seemed to be progressing and this bright light of a child seemed happier than he had been when I first meet him.
When he turned 13 and the full rush of hormones kicked in, he become a real handful. He talked about the boys he liked at school and the one in particular he felt drawn to. "Every time I see him my body trembles inside" was a very unique but I felt accurate description of what we all felt in those circumstances. Unknown to me he had acted on his feelings and got caught. The repercussions from those actions by his family were swift and merciless.
The monday before last my friend e-mailed me in the morning. He told me why I hadn't heard from him, that he had been severely beaten and not allowed near the computer as it was a bad influence on him. He told me that I had been his only true friend and that he loved me and wished that we were together. He told me that he didn't want to make any more mistakes, that what he put his family through had to stop. He apologized for not being able to help himself and that his feelings just overcame him and he had to act. He then said it wasn't my fault and that I was his best friend and not to feel bad. At the end of the message he told me to listen to "Don't stand at my grave and weep" by libera, "I love you always".
.Stevie, for you I played it for several hours after I im"d your computer and got an im back from your parents stating that you had taken your life. I am sorry that I couldn't help you, I miss you so much and as you pointed out in your message to me, my feelings have overcome me and I am still crying as I write you this one last message. I love you Stevie, I miss you, please God he may have taken his own life but I believe that no one in heaven would be worse off if you let him in, his compassion and selfless giving should at least get him a seat.
No mas
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