Why bother?
02-29-2012, 08:17 AM
I was also reminded of this article that you might find interesting (I have no idea what your age is, but if you're under 30 then this would definitely apply to you):
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/27/magazi...gewanted=1
It goes on to say that gay men in their 20s are more interested in settling down than in previous decades, but still somewhat a minority (for example, somewhere it said there were twice as many lesbians married by 30 than gay men). But that does mean that your chances of finding someone who wants to get serious rather than have a fling are getting better, and are likely to get even better over time.
Though I know plenty of straight men aren't in any hurry to settle down either, so I think it's more than what the article just says.
But again, just be patient. The right guy for you is out there. It's like a diamond mine, you have to go through a lot of dirt to get the high quality gem.
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/27/magazi...gewanted=1
Quote:(Joshua was referencing a longstanding joke —What does a lesbian bring on a second date? A U-Haul! — that is supposed to satirize the way some lesbians rush into cohabitation. The joke is sometimes paired with a second one about gay men rushing into bed: What does a gay man bring on a second date? What second date?)
Quote:There was a reason, of course, why so many gay men my age and older seemed intent on living a protracted adolescence: We had been cheated of our actual adolescence. While most of our heterosexual peers had experienced, in their teens, socialization around courtship, dating and sexuality, many of us had grown up closeted and fearful, “our most precious and tender feelings rarely validated or reflected back to us by our families and communities,†as Alan Downs, the author of “The Velvet Rage: Overcoming the Pain of Growing Up Gay in a Straight Man’s World,†puts it. When we managed to express our sexuality, the experience often came booby-trapped with secrecy, manipulation or debilitating shame.
No wonder, then, that in our 20s so many of us moved to big-city gay neighborhoods and aggressively went about trying to make up for lost time. And no wonder that some of us — myself included — occasionally went overboard.
“The expectation for many years was that if you did any dating in your 20s, they were essentially ‘practice relationships’ where you did what heterosexual kids get to do in junior high, high school and college,†says Jeffrey Chernin, a Los Angeles psychotherapist and the author of “Get Closer: A Gay Men’s Guide to Intimacy and Relationships.†“But for many gay men, your 20s were about meeting a lot of different people, going out to bars with your friends and having a lot of sex. That has long been considered a rite of passage in the gay community.â€Â
It goes on to say that gay men in their 20s are more interested in settling down than in previous decades, but still somewhat a minority (for example, somewhere it said there were twice as many lesbians married by 30 than gay men). But that does mean that your chances of finding someone who wants to get serious rather than have a fling are getting better, and are likely to get even better over time.
Though I know plenty of straight men aren't in any hurry to settle down either, so I think it's more than what the article just says.
But again, just be patient. The right guy for you is out there. It's like a diamond mine, you have to go through a lot of dirt to get the high quality gem.
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
And I like that song 
its cute lol Like ppl said b4, I just haven't met Mr. right and I know one day he will come along and treat me right and be with me, and etc 