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QA the parenting you recieve
#11
you cant pick your parents, roll of the dice, so if you have the best parents on the planet you did nothing to deserve them.

Just keep in mind you take after them a lot when you grow up. Its nice to know who we are so we dont continue the same way and we know where we need to improve upon.

I cant rember anything from when i grew up and some times catch me doing saying and i think where that come form?
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#12
Wow, I feel kinda bad that I had a good "coming out" , though I never technically did, as opposed to people like Jay & Dfiant ;( .

It could have been that way for me, had my father stayed in the picture, because although he says he loves me, I know it kills him that his first born son and namesake(I have his full name) is gay and won't carry on his "legacy" . He wouldn't have allowed me to be flamboyant like how I was (and still am abit Smile ) and probably would've done everything he could to change me.

He still sometimes tries to convince me that girls like me, and that I'm like him >.> .

He's had 5 children with 3 different women. ...
~

I feel really lucky and fortunate that I have my mommy and that she allows me to be me, but then again, I feel sorry for other people who don't have that same opportunity.

Kisses to you all that have it rough Smile .
Kiss3
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#13
My parents aren't that big in on my life when it comes to me being gay. They just want me to be happy and they know that I would tell them if I had a man in my life and they would be supportive no matter what, unless he was a complete dick and then they know I would break up with him right away.
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#14
do they just ignore you and your gayness or are they involved and helpful?

Uh, my parents have little interest in anything I do, so I can't particularly complain about them not taking too much interest in my sexuality. My mother is a bleeding heart liberal progressive (although also a religious nutbar) who has a hard time handling dealing with my sexuality, despite her best friend being a lesbian, her supporting my lesbian cousin through college when her parents kicked her out in the late 80s, and her intolerance against any sort of homophobia. However, she has a hard time thinking of me as gay, and whenever the topic is brought up she'll go into a tirade about not having any grandchildren, and me being unhappy because I'm gay, and what have you. It should be noted that my mother is bipolar and doesn't quite get along with anyone in the family.

My father couldn't express a sincere emotion towards anyone if it would save his life. But his only comment on the subject of my sexuality was "whatever makes you happy" and he is openly supportive of gay issues.

My poor mother has had to deal with one of her sons becoming a pornographer and atheist who doesn't believe in marriage or children. And her other son grew up to be a gay, atheist, and academic. Lord, if the neighbours knew she'd never live it down.

I think she deals with all the contradictions in her behaviour through some sort of complex nets of cognitive dissonance.

-Do they know who you are dating?
I'm not dating anyone.

-Have they met him or her, if you wanted them to?

Well they knew my high school fling, but not as any sort of romantic interest. A few years back I tried introducing one and my mum was a total bitch to him.

-Have they been informative for the safe sex topic?

My parents don't know shit about safe sex, they were raised in the 50s.

-Would they be more better constructive if you were straight??

Probably not, they fucked up my brother pretty well too.

-How much do you love the rents?

Loads, but some days I wish them horrible deaths.
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#15
do they just ignore you and your gayness or are they involved and helpful?
Probably ignore it and think it is a phase...but i see them starting to accept it slowly, at least my mother and my sis, and my whole family cause honestly i have been everythyng but a normal kid growing up. OMG when i realise how brave i was as a little boy , but then just seeing what i did was out of the normal picture, i started withdrawing, and actually feelin homophobic which is ironic right ? that is why i have self confidence problems
Do they know who you are dating?
no, cause i haven't dated anyone , haven't kissed anyone to be exact
Have they met him or her, if you wanted them to?
When you are in love adn talk about that person all the time, if they are smart enough they will know who i am in love with, but i won't sit them on the same table
Have they been informative for the safe sex topic

They are totally informed about everything, we talk about it a lot , like a lot maybe more than we should Smile
Would they be more better constructive if you were straight?
I remeber this one time i brought a girl, she was more of a hag to me than a girlfirend and they though sth was going on between us, and were so happy, so i imagine they still have trouble accepting that they won't have any grandkids around'em...definitely they would prefer if i was straight
How much do you love the rents?
A lot, especially my mom, has been such a brave, role model for me, but i like my dad too, although i am mad at him because maybe if he was around more i would have been a normal kid Sad
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#16
It was weirs coming out to my mother. Sh was mad at me but not for the usual reasons, she said I scared her and made it seem like a big deal.
I told her that I had something extremely important to say and that a lot of people would find it depraved. After I told her I was bisexual and had already made love to a man, she was like "get to the depraved part!" I explained that was it. She then had to tell me what she does consider depraved.
I'll never be able to look my cousin in the face again, or think of Donkeys the same way again.
Things never changed between us
However my father lives in his own world and would go into denial if I told him.
My brother harbors a lot of homophobic beliefs, but only when it comes to men. He has a lot of lesbian friends. They have yet to be told. (they're practically the only ones in the world along with the rest of my relatives).

-my mother knows who I'm dating and has met him, they get along very well
-she always told me she wouldn't care about my sexual orientation and was being honest
-me and my mom have always been very close and I love her
As for my father he was emotionally and verbally abusive when I was young, I do give him credit for admitting it, apologizing and trying to make it up to me.
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#17
I had my coming out when I was 16.... 1983... my mother was 56 at that time...

I never had problems... we had more funny moments .... I remind on a situation we sit in a Café.. my mother, my bf, myself and some friends of my mother. The door opens and a women comes in ... came to our table and we start to talk, after a while she asks who is he ... looking at my bf .. my mother said "It´s my son-in-law .." she asks.. "Ah ..and your daughter is working ?" . My mother said " no, thats a mistake ... he´s the fiance´ of my son"


Or ..my brother comes home ... totally drunk... he slammed himself the door against his head ... was very angry ... and shouted : I´m hurt ... nobody cares ... and the fags are sleeping" ...My mother .. 65 at that time ...came out of her bedroom and we heared... "whack...Whack" I will help you to call your brother a fag.... next morning he comes out of his room ..a complete swollen face... and excused himself ... " I seems that I wasn´t correct last night" .. " and it seems that I had a accident".... my mother said " I was your accident... name someone here fag again and I help you down the stairs in the same way " ...

Or .. I came home after a date... and I was so full of lovesickness.... she asked " What wrong" ... nothing .... " You love him" .. no comment ... "you both had sex ?" ...maybe..
She came out of the kitchen, gave me a few beers and said .. " The best thing after nothing with no comments and maybe sex is to drink a beer and go to sleep"...

a few years befor she died she told me.. "Son ... to have a gay son was the best thing what could happen to me... I never feld alone "

Goddess ... I miss her :frown:
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#18
Fenris, your mother sounded like a beautiful person. We should all be as lucky as you to have a mother who loves her gay children unrequited Confusedmile:
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