major crush on guy friend

[harrison1]

i have a major crush on my guy friend
ok so im 16 and a sophomore in high school. there is this kid who i reallllyyyy like. hes funny and really attractive. he's really into drama and acting, but he also does tech or running crew for shows. i met him this year and we "flirt" all the time (i dont know if hes joking) he dates a lot of girls but they never last very long. we joke around like we are gay all the time and like jokingly touch each other. and one time there was this big sleepover with a bunch of people and i was bored and laid next to him (under the same blanket) and our legs like intertwined. but when i left he cuddled with this girl. and another time we went to mcdonalds and our legs were touching the entire time. we also text a lot which i find a little odd but idk. also people have called him gay (jokingly) and once our drama teacher said that he was "fruity". i dont want to make a move on him without knowing he would be ok with it since we are becoming really good friends. but like every time i see him i run towards him and jump into his arms and stuff, and i dont do that with my other guy friends. and the fact that he never has had a long-lasting relationships makes me wonder. i dont know if im over analyzing it or just making the whole thing up so thats why im posting this. i just can't get him off my mind and im kinda going crazy! hahahha hopefully you guys can help

[dfiant]

G Day and welcome to Gayspeak.

I'll be straight up with you. Your friend is not in a place to accept his sexuality, that's assuming he is gay (Assume = make an ASS out of U and ME), simple as that. Always assume a guy is straight until he actually tells you other wise, good rule of thumb to avoid heart break and embarrassment.

As for crushing on someone, boy I wish there was a good cure for that because we all crush on people that we shouldn't and sometimes it is tough to let it go.

It sounds like a pretty solid friendship you have going there, hold onto that and protect it

[Sil]

That's a tough one, I think I agree with Dfiant in that I wouldn't want you to assume something and then end up hurting yourself... I had a crush like that in my teens and it's awkward when you really want to say something; there's a period of sexual fluidity around that age.

Sometimes it's nice just hanging out and being close I think maybe that's the point you're both at. It's an awesome thing so I'd just value what you have as buddies unless he says otherwise. Don't let it eat you up or stop you wanting to date other guys if you feel like it... sometimes crushes can be just what they are, nice daydreams.

[pellaz]

rumors are quick to spread in HS, if you dont plan to out your self...

[princealbertofb]

You're both in that age range where things aren't quite fixed yet in sexuality. The fact that he has many girlfriends proves only that he can't stick to one girl at the moment and that he's sampling. He may one day also sample male romances and sex... who knows? ... but in the mean time you can't tell what cooks his oyster, or what butters his bread, unless, of course, you are brave enough to let him know, you know, on the off hand, that you are gay or think you are gay and can get feed back on how he feels about it. But that's if you are brave, not afraid of losing a good buddy and assuming he's well enough sorted with his feelings and sexuality not to fear being with you. Note that it might end the sort of buddy-buddiness you've been enjoying so far and he might be more distant. I suppose that's what you're intimately afraid of, right?
I know it sucks but gay guys often have to keep themselves to themselves for all sorts of reasons: avoiding heartache, avoiding being beaten up or slandered, avoiding being outed by less sensitive people, avoiding getting the cold treatment from people they used to think of as friends... sad state of affairs, I know, but it's best to stick to those who really enjoy being gay and won't mind sharing their hearts and souls and bodies with you. Be patient!

And by the way, see if you can get some of the inside knowledge from some of the girls he's been dating, that might help...
Take care,
PA

[Rainbowmum]

Hello and
There is not much more I can add and I have to agree with all the advice above.

High School , hormones, rumors , expectation ,a very bad combination.
If he has not told you he is gay , leave it at that.
Do not read to much into things and do not over analyze .
Stay friends and enjoy each others company.

[princealbertofb]

By the way, Harrison 1, to GaySpeak. Hope you find here some answers to the questions that are besieging you.