Continiued from "Hello from a straight woman" ...

[lili]

Continued from the thread:
"Hello from a straight woman" in the Intro section:
So I thought we should continue to talk here, considering that we moved from introduction to chit chat. [for which I am very grateful, considering - as imaginary as it maybe, I like very much having my cloths on while running through the crowds ]
Now, I am sorry I wasn't able to check the thread for 2 days. In a simple cause and effect train, here is what happened:
boiler kaput-->water boiling for shower-->too much steam--> crappy paint job becomes crappier-->open windows let steam out--> shower (more like wipe dirt around)--> come out of the dirt re-distribution to the very cold room because of letting all the steam out-->cold and fever.
Things I am grateful for today: New boiler coming tomorrow!!!!!!!! (I am just trying to stop my digressing problem. thus the avoidance of actual sentences! How do you like them apples Shakespeare???? )
So, back to where we were:

It is indeed very easy to consider one or another stereotypical idea about homosexual culture. It is the idea of refusing to limit one's determinations based solely upon one or another of these classic or popular ideas that makes for true room for growth and acceptance. So personally I thank you sincerely. I would from there challenge you to help us (homosexual culture) spread the word that there is no solely accurate stereotype. Homosexual people run the full gammit from feminine to masculine just like heterosexual people. Of course you clearly understand this and I'm not preaching to the choir here, but acknowledged the true value in having you visit and be a part of GS.

I am happy if I can be of help but I feel this is going to be a long long long loooong winding road for homosexuals.

...At lease in n America being gay is not what it used to be, no one you pass on the side walk cares. ...

I live half a world away from States, so obviously my observations are only third party statements, but thanks to the up-coming elections, there were more comments on several topics than usual. And what I heard from the probably hyped-up due to sensationalism sells media, was not what pellaz was saying. To me it sounds like gay bashing is about to become national sport again. At least that's the reaction to the Wanna-be-KFC-uncle with an obviously direct red-hot-line to God and the couple (!!!) people standing in line for fried chicken, make me think.
There is a lack of "gay information" out there. And it is human nature to fill any void with any crap that is found. But then again we live in an age generally where gay information is considered to unequal parts indecent, pornographic, and interesting. Admittedly compared to punishable by death it is a huge step forward but it is a long way from the dream state of "a couple's a couple" state in my opinion. I am happy to help out.

I am especially intrigued by your description of how the Japanese female population are thought to have begun Yaoi. I find that very interesting and think this would be a wonderful area for thesis work comparing the history to the overt societal and cultural norms regarding sex, procreation, religion and politics in Japan. I would LOVE to hear from some of our Asian members on any understanding that might could be shared...

Like I said before I cannot vouch for the correctness of that information but from my point of view it makes sense to me. I grew up in a sexually oppressive environment. When I was growing up even the chaste kisses of the old musicals was something that would color the cheeks of my parents when watched in company, and My then 7-9 year old self would often leave the room for kitchen or the bathroom. In my family we never had the talk of bees and the birds. Not even the one of menstruation, and no, there was no Carrie-situation, though God knows I would have liked one, discovering my first period after running around in a stained school uniform for a whole effing day. This incessant avoidance of the topic implied to me then that sex was a no-good thing. And then you hit the puberty. the hormones tell you the exact opposite, And no matter how ignorant you are, you do discover masturbation, and then come the feelings of guilt, because sex feels so good. Yaoi, allows women to "enjoy" sexual relationships from the "farthest" pov. It is feminized man on man, giving you the romance with the sizzling crackling exciting and juicy (ok the adjectives are my addition!) erotics. In a sense it absolves the women of the engraved guilt of enjoying sex. To the younger generation that grew up in an liberal environment, this may sound ridiculous. But my take is. people from less liberal-more traditional parts of the world, or more religion influenced parts of the world will have an easier time understanding what I am saying.

As a lady myself, I'm going to jump right in there and say it -- at least 50% of all females know of and enjoy yaoi and/or gay porn (however secretly or openly that may be). We get a lot of flack about it from men who find it disgusting that women watch such things -- but then, guys watch lesbian porn so it's a bit of a double standard! If you'd like to connect with other women who share this interest, you can check out forums like aaronfantasy and social media sites like tumblr. )

Amen sister! The bigotry of it enrages me more, the older I get. Despite the era, women who have one-night-stands are still considered sluts, but men are considered man's men! If a person's honor is located between their legs all humanity is screwed, because I have got news. Medical profession is at its most advanced and there is no such bone in the human body, and it is definitely not, i repeat NOT between one's legs.
Btw apart from Aarinfantasy (aarinfantasy.com), there is also Nihonomaru (nihonomaru.com)

...It's perfectly alright for you to find such things interesting and enjoyable even if you wouldn't practice them yourself; that is what media entertainment is for -- to explore, learn about and enjoy things you wouldn't actually want to do in real life but still think of as interesting and entertaining. This is doubly true when it comes to porn (animated or otherwise!)

Can I say one thing here?: THANK YOU! I LOVE YOU! (Ok obviously I have problems counting)

...About role assignment: In most modern-day gay relationships in the West, there are no set roles. About 90% of gay male couples I've interacted with may prefer bottoming/topping but have no qualms with switching it up at all. The "set role" phenomena you witness in Japanese porn is, however, very real to them. One person (the top -- aka the "seme" in Japanese) does absolutely all of the work. The other (the bottom/"uke") simply lies there submissively and amplifies the image with crying and helpless noises. It has been my experience that this relationship ideal in Japan is very, very real, and trying to switch it up or "equal the playing field" can be confusing and very disconcerting for them even/especially in straight relationships. But that isn't the case for most Western gay males as far as I know. Some are going to be feminine, some masculine, some anywhere in between, and some without a care -- but you won't as often see the Seme/uke dynamic in Western couples as you would in Japanese couples. (I could honestly go on forever about the Japanese dynamics if you'd like, as it's very different but hard to explain in just a few sentences, so if you'd like to know more about what you're seeing in the Japanese presentation specifically from a cultural perspective, please feel free to PM me).

I certainly don't find you to be out of place here. During gay pride fests and such, you'll often find straight supporters of gays or politely/genuinely curiously individuals who like to call themselves "straight, not narrow," and you seem to fit right in with that. You're courteous and kind and your posts are thoughtful... so don't worry : )

Again THANK YOU! First mostly because of the role assignment. That is seriously one of the questions that interest me. The choice of top or bottom is one of the things that stretches my obviously sexually still a little narrow heterosexual mind. Ok, words may escape me a little here so try please to be patient with my mambo jumbos. I as a heterosexual woman cannot get sexual satisfaction biologically nor emotionally from doing the entering. I need to be entered to get fulfillment. So the no set roles part sort of confuses me. Honestly I think if I were at least bisexual I would understand that part more, but lacking that, the emotional un-attachement, to either/or, is hard to grasp for me.
And as for the Japanese Semes/Ukes and the crying and the helplessness, I honestly thought that was exaggerated, if not made up, due to expanding on the idea of "absolution of the guilt" (you know, I cannot help but enjoy, so if I am enjoying sex it is not my fault way of thinking) theory. And yes I WOULD VERY MUCH LIKE TO GEEK OUT about the Japanese dynamics and Yaoi. Either on a thread, because I think it is very interesting, or via pm, if you prefer. Nick9 referred me to a Thread which I devoured but which was already closed unfortunately.

...
I know that yaoi is loved by a huge amount of straight girls and women. Yaoi, gay erotic novels and gay porn as well, you are definitely not the only one and there is no need to feel weird If you look at the authors you can realize that many of them are also written by women.
There are several threads at GS, one example:
gayspeak.com/showthread.php?t=19562

So if you are interested, check it out!
And finally thanks again Honestly every-time I come here I feel less awkward and more myself. So Thank you!