05-23-2013, 12:07 AM
Parents don't even need to threaten abused kids to keep them quiet. If they learn they can't even trust their parents, then why would they trust any other adult? Especially when the other adults almost always side with their parents anyway?
In retrospect I find it amazing that my once best friend took evidence to the school counselor to show she was abused. His reaction was was "get communication flowing" and try to call her dad which terrified her (and her dad had beaten her mom into a hospital and finally mental hospital when she tried leaving, which was when he'd gained custody of her), but luckily he hadn't paid his phone bill so he called her grandparents instead (who asked him if he was insane trying to call her dad). After that she never went to another adult for help.
Child abuse investigations are actually easy to bypass in many cases, if you can convince anyone asking questions that your child has run away from home, and some can even get the extended family to endorse the lie. Heck, one person tried in California to get CPS to intervene for a girl and even with constant calls it took 6 weeks (told it normally took 6 MONTHS, plenty of time for physical damage to heal) for a deputy to even go out there who asked a handful of questions and left without checking anything out (as it turned out the father had been honest, he'd sent his girl to a teen gulag to be ritually abused by Christians due to her interest in Wicca and she one day returned utterly brainwashed from whatever horrors they visited upon her).
As a runaway I met plenty of other kids running from abusive homes, some of them foster. The interesting bit is that some in foster care wanted to go back to their real families but couldn't because their parents (in one case, her entire extended family in the United States who'd otherwise been eligible to take her and other kids in) were in prison...that is I got the impression that most kids in foster care are there because the parents were convicted of abusing drugs, not abusing children (btw, many cases of child abuse treated seriously by authorities seem to have an added element of drug abuse being reported as well). And as for those fleeing their biological (or at least adoptive) homes, they didn't get any help at all, even in the rare case they tried (like my then best friend).
Calling the authorities really is a crap shoot. They may take it seriously or they may ignore it...and even if they follow up on it they may do so in a way that makes things worse for the child instead of better. I'm just glad that people exist who break the law to help children (even if they seem vastly outnumbered by those who break the law to harm children).
In retrospect I find it amazing that my once best friend took evidence to the school counselor to show she was abused. His reaction was was "get communication flowing" and try to call her dad which terrified her (and her dad had beaten her mom into a hospital and finally mental hospital when she tried leaving, which was when he'd gained custody of her), but luckily he hadn't paid his phone bill so he called her grandparents instead (who asked him if he was insane trying to call her dad). After that she never went to another adult for help.
Child abuse investigations are actually easy to bypass in many cases, if you can convince anyone asking questions that your child has run away from home, and some can even get the extended family to endorse the lie. Heck, one person tried in California to get CPS to intervene for a girl and even with constant calls it took 6 weeks (told it normally took 6 MONTHS, plenty of time for physical damage to heal) for a deputy to even go out there who asked a handful of questions and left without checking anything out (as it turned out the father had been honest, he'd sent his girl to a teen gulag to be ritually abused by Christians due to her interest in Wicca and she one day returned utterly brainwashed from whatever horrors they visited upon her).
As a runaway I met plenty of other kids running from abusive homes, some of them foster. The interesting bit is that some in foster care wanted to go back to their real families but couldn't because their parents (in one case, her entire extended family in the United States who'd otherwise been eligible to take her and other kids in) were in prison...that is I got the impression that most kids in foster care are there because the parents were convicted of abusing drugs, not abusing children (btw, many cases of child abuse treated seriously by authorities seem to have an added element of drug abuse being reported as well). And as for those fleeing their biological (or at least adoptive) homes, they didn't get any help at all, even in the rare case they tried (like my then best friend).
Calling the authorities really is a crap shoot. They may take it seriously or they may ignore it...and even if they follow up on it they may do so in a way that makes things worse for the child instead of better. I'm just glad that people exist who break the law to help children (even if they seem vastly outnumbered by those who break the law to harm children).