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My partner asked if we could have a 3-Some with a friend... What's he trying to tell me?
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Don't read into it too much. He's probably just trying to tell you exactly what he said - that he wants a threesome. It doesn't mean he's lost interest in you or anything like that - perhaps he wants to try something new or perhaps it's always been a fantasy of his. You really need to talk more to him about it. Find out why he wants to do it and then agree or disagree.
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I will second what SolemnBoy says and add that only he will be able to tell you why he wants to do this. Don't assume the worst, chances are that its a fantasy that he wants to try out just once. If you're not comfortable with it then don't hesitate to let him know that you're uncomfortable, you don't want to pressure yourself into doing something that pleases him if you're going to be left with ill feelings after.
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Sounds to me he has this fantasy he want's to share with you. I doubt it is more than just a lust-filled/pleasure promising fantasy. IDK, such affairs don't usually go beyond the bedroom and become polymorphous relationships.
Talk more with him and find out more.
I have had partners in the past 'suggest' 3-ways, never did it, but it was put out there as a thing to try -'someday' - some day never arrived. So I assume its a common 'desire'.
However these sorts of ideas never actually take off and fly since its usually pretty hard to find a third wheel the couple can trust and actually be comfortable with. Then there is the potential for emotional damage to the relationship.
If you are interested, I strongly suggest you and your partner discuss the ins and outs of whom you wish to include, then have a 'verbal contract' with that person as to the ins and outs and expectations.
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I'm less concerned about the request for a 3 way than I am at the suggestion that it include a FRIEND (someone known to both of you. A friend!).
RECIPE FOR DISASTER!
If you choose to indulge this "fantasy" my best advice is to find a stranger who you're both interested in.
If you don't understand the dynamics at work here, then you should probably just decline the entire offer.
Good luck.
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that he wants to have a threesome ?
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Personally, that would be a question that ends the relationship.
Cant trust anyone who has other feelings for other guys that way.
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I have to agree along the lines of not being able to trust anyone even my partner in a three way. Its something we've discussed before and we both agree that even if we "know" the rules in our brains our hearts just wont allow for it. It would still feel like cheating even if the other knew and participated. I guess more power to you other couples that can do it and are seemingly fine. I just cant imagine finding sexual satisfaction outside of the relationship I have with my bf. If it sounds like Im judging Im really not trying to, its just a concept I cant wrap my brain around. Its like trying to teach nuclear physics to a cat, I just cant fathom it.
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why?
