Frat Guy

[idontknow]

Hey, Im new here and obviously I am not out (to everyone) because if i was, i would say my name.

So i have an issue, I am a Frat Guy, I mean im not really the jock sexy mofo type, more like th e sarcastic gamer clown that is friends with everyone. I have never been with a dude before and recently i have tried dating a girl and it didnt really work because i didnt feel anything. I, honestly, wish i wasnt gay... it would make it easier but i am what i am and im cool with it, kinda. i wish it was easy but im scared to come out because i love all my friends. very few people know that im gay.

lately i have been lonely. i wanted to date, but its hard bc... well...i have an image to represent... and i dont want to jeopardize anything bc of me. but ive been wanting a partner, or at least a friend that i can talk to ya know?

i dont really know anyone i can talk to about this bc my friends are straight (i think) and they dont know what im really feeling. and its also easier to talk to strangers....


i guess what i am asking is.... what should i do? fear is holding me back...

[TomStatic]

I understand what you mean maybe try join some sort of Social club near enough you and you would meet new people there and could find a good friendship and other than that you can talk with me if you need any advice or a new friend

[Undreamt]

everyone goes through similar experiences but that doesn't mean everyone's story is the same, talk to people read stories, when your comfortable with yourself then its alot easier to let other people in.

[pellaz]

welcome to gaySpeak

well give it a try and experiment how it might work for you. Put a label on it "Gay" but a person's sexuality is an individual thing. I hope you are able to choose what works best, the strongest relationship.

Being gay could be not such a big thing anymore. If your school has a lgbt center this might be a good resource. A hag girl friend might be the most understanding.

[LateBloomer]

Hey, Im new here and obviously I am not out (to everyone) because if i was, i would say my name.

So i have an issue, I am a Frat Guy, I mean im not really the jock sexy mofo type, more like th e sarcastic gamer clown that is friends with everyone. I have never been with a dude before and recently i have tried dating a girl and it didnt really work because i didnt feel anything. I, honestly, wish i wasnt gay... it would make it easier but i am what i am and im cool with it, kinda. i wish it was easy but im scared to come out because i love all my friends. very few people know that im gay.

lately i have been lonely. i wanted to date, but its hard bc... well...i have an image to represent... and i dont want to jeopardize anything bc of me. but ive been wanting a partner, or at least a friend that i can talk to ya know?

i dont really know anyone i can talk to about this bc my friends are straight (i think) and they dont know what im really feeling. and its also easier to talk to strangers....


i guess what i am asking is.... what should i do? fear is holding me back...

Search for another guy who would also like to keep things very quiet, discrete and stay in the closet (for now).

Not everybody wants or needs to be OUT.

You come out when the time is right for you (and your BF, if it goes that far).

Yeah, in some ways, this is gonna make your life more complicated and stressful, let me tell you. I was leading a "double life" for about 6 months before I came out to friends and family. But once I found the right guy, I just said to hell with it.

And yeah, it's a cliche to say, When you come out you find out who are your real friends, but it's totally true. Your good friends stick around, they will tell you they are honored you shared this news with them, and they wish you luck and happiness.

No shit.


The rest of them can go to hell.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Hmm. There are lots and lots of 'coming out' type stories and situation here on Gayspeak. Peruse the help forum and see what others have had in the way of similar problems. Look for similarities in their story to your own.

I think that if you see first hand that you are not alone, about 1/3rd of the 'trouble' you have here will be eased.

You are not alone... Lots of guys go through this stage of life, they hate the gay in them and they feel isolated, alone, terrified to reach out to anyone.

But you are here now - there are a lot of very cool, people who won't judge you for being gay.