Ok, I am a straight women that is completely supportive of the gay community, I have been to several pride parades, and I have a few gay friends, and I have explored my sexuality hehehe
SOO my question:
I have a 3 year old daughter and a 6, almost 7 year old son, he has ADHD and ODD and I am trying my best to teach him to be honest with himself and his feelings. I have noticed several tendencies (happening constantly not just once or twice) like he wears ear rings, he always trys on his sisters play heals, he said how he would love to have a pink mustang, on his wrestling game he created a player that was quite colorful and wearing a thong with a strapless short shirt and a few other things he does that just makes me ask myself. I am a single mom and im just wondering you know, should I talk to him about it? I don't care either way, gay or straight I just want to do the best I can in supporting him, and I don't want to plant seeds in his head about anything. Should I talk to him, if so how? hes so young should I just let it be? When I have asked him he says "NOO!" with a weird, confused face lol I just don't want him to think he has to hide any of his feelings and true wants. I have a brother who is gay (I have seen his texts and email about secretly meeting dudes and how much he likes the feel of anal sex and with hard cock pressed against his ass, his ex loved watching him get "pounded" ) but he hides it and actually bashes gays because he was raised (weren't raised together) to think being gay is not OK.
Anyways, I don't want him to think any feelings he may have are not ok but I don't know how to talk to him about it or if I should. any advice?
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First off, thats very open minded and loving of you to accept your kids as they are.
BUT
Just because a little boy likes to "dress up", doenst mean he's gay. He is probably just fascinated by "girl stuff". Lots of boys put on mommies high heels, just to see how mommy can walk in such silly things. Boys like bright colors too. I mean, really, "boy" colors are just SO BORING!!! Id go for fun colors myself, even though I do like SOME "boy" colors.
If he watches wrestling, then he's probably used to seeing a lot of those wrestlers in bright, neon, colors. He might be mimicking them, who knows.
I dont believe a child knows their own sexuality until they get to the puberty stage. THEN they may have questions about who they are and what they like...but thats a part of growing up.
Who knows, next year your son may like skulls, motorcycles, and bandanas.
Unlike most adults, kids like to "give everything a try". Which is the only way they can figure out what they like and dont like.
I would say to you.....your son is just interested in many things. Let him discover all the colors out there.
There are museums that cater to kids of their ages. They even have classes for kids sometimes. If you live in or near a big city, see if there are any kid friendly museums. He may love that. Art of all kinds, is full of colors, shapes, sizes, and forms.
I have a friend who has her kids do EVERYTHING! And she does it with them. She has a boy and a girl, and they are both around 14 years old. And just being 14, they know how to ski, kayak, paint, dance, belly dance, bake, and several different kinds of art they can do, sewing, camping, and hiking.
They arent rich, but she's taken them around the world twice so far. They have volunteered to help kids in India and in Nepal. They have been on cruises, picked apples from orchards, gone to multitudes of museums, and tons of other stuff.
You'd be surprised of how much of what she does is actually FREE!!!
Anyway, I got off track.....
Just let your son explore the world, but always with an eye on him.
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I'd say at his age the confused face seems quite appropriate 
It's great that you're so open to it, and not like "oh my god, bricking it that my son might be gay", but I think you're expecting answers from him a bit soon. At his age I can't imagine his sexuality is really warranting much contemplation, even if he was straight I think it'd be pretty hard to determine at this juncture. So, I personally wouldn't recommend talking to him about it just yet... maybe when he's 13-15 and still wearing heels. xD
But seriously, I think you need to think of it from his age's point of view, in regards to the colours, and heel-wearing, etc. He probably just isn't feeling particularly held back by any of the usual "norms" that children eventually learn - blue is for boys, pink is for girls, etc. Or maybe he just doesn't care? I think at his age it's still pretty normal for him to not feel the shame that society burns into us as we're processed through the educational system.
He probably likes the colour pink just because he likes it - I can't imagine he'd be putting the same sort of meaning to it that you are, he might just consider it a "colour", as opposed to a "girly colour".
Of course, that's not to say he isn't gay, but I think you're safe from having to "worry" about it (for want of a better word) for a good few years. Right now, I think most of the signs you're seeing are just signs that he's enjoying his childhood.
That being said, I exhibited most of these symptoms (again, using that word only cause I can't think of a better one) when I was a child, so in contrast to my main point, it could potentially be a sign.
Either way, regardless of how he ends up, I'm sure he'll be fine with a supportive mother like you 
...I hope my post was helpful in some way. :/
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My wife and her brother are both gay, when speaking to my mother-in-law she tells me stories all of the time about how she knew that they were gay from an extremely early age. She did not bring her suspicions up to either of them when they were young, instead choosing to allow them to embrace any interests that they had and eventually come out to her in their own time. If I had a child whom I suspected of being gay that is how I would go about it. That being said I feel that it is extremely important to allow children to explore their interests without labeling them as "girl things" or "boy things". When I was young I loved dolls, fishing, hiking, sewing, baking, gardening, baseball, and art -- not once do I recall anyone telling me that any of those things were reserved for one gender. My mother has also told me that both of my (entirely straight) older brothers had dolls when they were young, she gave them to them in an effort to raise sensitive men.
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Rosie Wrote:both of my (entirely straight) older brothers had dolls when they were young, she gave them to them in an effort to raise sensitive men.
did it work ?
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It did, though I'm certain that the dolls only played a small role.
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Just as a "sidebar" here.....
My whole life, including when I was very young....I have had an interest in just about everything.
When I was little, I played "house" with the girl across the street, as well as want to tinker with small engines and machines. Percolators and irons fascinated me when I was little. I loved taking things apart and putting them back together.
As I got older, I learned how to work on my own vehicle. I can change my brake pads, change a tire, fix a carburetor, replace hoses and belts, and even a few engine parts. Ive learned how to lay carpet and tile, and do some other things that involve construction of homes.
I like dolls and collect the very high end kind of Barbies. I love beautiful dresses, just because a beautiful dress can turn any woman into Cinderella, and I find that amazing. I have an appreciation of art too. And Im not talking just about what most people consider art as being.
Art is everything, and everything is art. Staking a tent is art, as much as baking a cake and turning it into a Birthday treat. Mechanics are artists. Doctors are artists. Architects are artists. Farmers are artists.
My granny told me when I was young, "If you learn how to do everything for yourself, then you wont have to depend on anybody to do it for you". And thats what I did. I have attempted to learn how to do everything possible to make sure I dont have to depend on others too much.
My granny never stifled me when I was growing up. She let me explore whatever I wanted and bought me things that expanded my thinking. I may not have ended up being rich or famous, but because of my granny not holding me down or pigeonholing my talents or knowledge, she allowed me to see, think, feel what most other parents never let their kids do.
Now, being older.....I can fix my own vehicle if I need too. I bake professional style pastries and cakes for friends. I can make a wedding dress or a fancy tote bag. I can pretty much safely say, I could probably build my own house, as well as design it. I can plow a field, and I can give fashion sense to the fashionable disabled.
Just make sure your kids do pick one thing in life, and work on it until its perfected. Im a "Jack of All Trades", and it barely pays the bills. Nobody ever told me to pick one thing and get good at it, so I could make money and save it, in order to retire early in life and then have fun.
Work these things into your kids' future, not just having fun, but helping to build something they can use to depend on themselves.
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There was a similar thread not long ago, started by Daisy(?) Does anybody remember its title?
I am not sure what you have already talked about, but if you want just to hint that it is ok, I believe there are short stories for kids where the main character lives with two moms or dads.
I believe there are straight men who like girly things and gay men who would never wear bright colors. I would advice to wait.
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My Grandson's 3 and a bit
My Granddaughter 2 and a bit
see my photo album
Both play with pink prams & toy trucks and cars and plastic push trikes
Point is, at 3, there is no association with background implications / meanings it's just what catches their fancy
The rest will come much later and may even flip flop for a while.
no worry
Just glad they he has the opportunity to pick & choose
Trial by error
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