afraid to lose your masculinity?

[OGB]

I can relate but I think that if you are not feminine now you won't be. I don't think being gay and camp go hand in hand. I have a cousin who is gay and very camp , when he was little he was very feminine and that was before he had found his sexuality , that side of him was there from the get go,that sort of made it easier for him to come out to his family.Me I knew I was gay when I was a kid but no one noticed , girls still asked me out , my friends still spoke to me about what girls they would bag or not whithout realizing I could not care less.I am planning to come out soon but I don't imagine that the fact that I say out loud that I'm gay will change the way I speak or talk...
Actually to the op , do you think you were more masculine before you came out as gay ? Did your friend told you that you were becoming more feminine? If this is not the case , I wouldn't worry...(Although there is nothing wrong about beeing feminine at all)

[Joshular]

Have you guys ever thought about this? What do you think about your masculinity. Do you think you've become to feminine?

I think I 2 souls on male one female. Solved all my problems and gave me a new look on why I am the way I am n.n
Tho I use to try to hide every little bit of my femininity while I was in the closet. Then BOOM! I came out of the closet and in came A LOT of femininity. But I'm fine with it. Also I think it has balanced out over time. It doesn't for everyone. But we are who we are and I think that we should all strive to be the best people we can be. We are allowed to be feminine or masculine or both or neither >.< Just try your best to be nice to other people. Life's to short to suffer rude people. People aren't going to like you if you aren't nice.

[pellaz]

most of us sit at a desk, never really touch any real, part of a team. go home on the train, eat at the corner pub, surf/FB/post here. Straight acting is fake too. Can anyone really say, with out a super human struggle, pour a new garage floor, install a new ECU in the hatch back. Have a 1200 calorie day at the gym?

[Edward]

I'm masculine, I've always been and I always will be. Gay or not, but I think a man should act like a man.

[Dreamer]

When I was still madly conflicted with my sexuality and identity,
during the mid-teen years,
I was slightly afraid of not having enough "masculine" traits,
for the simple reason of wanting to fit in,
and to prevent myself from being picked on further by my hetero counterparts.


It's funny because when I first came out
(at age 12) ,
I deeply indulged in my naturally subtle feminine traits,
to the point of where they were gushing through every aspect of my existence,
perhaps, in an attempt to understand and grasp the notion of my true self
(which took most of my adolescence to figure out).


In that journey,
I discovered the cruelty that is often released on gay men.


I can't say that those negative experiences helped mold my current mannerisms,
because I feel that I portray my natural self, with no effort.


I'm not trying to be uphold and exhibit masculine traits... I just am.


Yes, I have my "queeny" moments,
and I'm not ashamed of them,
or afraid that they will one day
extinguish all aspects of "masculinity" within myself.

[kidchameleon]

It's never really been an issue for me. If I like something, I like it - I don't tend to care what people will think of me for it. I like a lot of "guy stuff", but then... I also like Hello Kitty, Sailor Moon, the Wizard of Oz, etc, I did a year at hairdressing college, and at school I always preferred volleyball to football - so I have plenty of "feminine" qualities too. If people don't like it, I won't shove it in their face, but I certainly won't exactly hide it from them either, I'll just focus on other things.

If people only liked me for my masculine traits, I would be pretty offended. I don't think any man is 100% masculine, and if he was I think he'd be missing out on a lot. A lot of amazing traits are considered feminine, like empathy for instance - I'd rather be considered "the one you can talk to about real stuff" than "the one who'll drink a beer with you while you talk about football". I am pretty adaptable in social situations - hence my name - but I don't lie about who I am, whether people would want me to or not, I merely emphasize certain traits around certain people, which I think is a cool way to work. When I'm with my guys, I talk about "dude stuff", and when I'm with my girls, I talk about "chick stuff". But it's no different to when I'm with my gamer friends, or my slightly-snobby friends, or my art student friends.

I think the key to happiness is to explore every side of yourself. Explore your masculinity, your femininity, everything. Don't label it as such, just see it as being honest with yourself, and finding out who you are. We all have to do it eventually :p

[Sylph]

I'm masculine, I've always been and I always will be. Gay or not, but I think a man should act like a man.

Oh gurl, you just don't know badly so how I wanna jump!

Colour me offended.

This is why I don't like men, however, something about y'all makes my girly parts do the Taboo Tango -.-

Argh...Men...

[trywait]

to each their own; you shouldn't let anyone's opinion of you affect as a person.

it took a long time to become comfortable in my own skin. im not overtly masculine but im def not feminine either. im not campy but have no issues with flamboyant queers. im more concerned with his personality and what's on the inside than their behavior.

im not really into team sports but I do enjoy swimming, biking, tennis, golf....blah blah blah. my guilty pleasures are chick flicks because I never expected to enjoy miss congeniality, 27 dresses, or the devil wears prada as much as I do.

i'm just me and if you accept me for whoever I am, then we will certainly get along because in turn, I will accept you for whoever you are. otherwise, don't invade my personal space and make like a tree and leave.

ps: I like being a guy and I have no plans of changing it

[sillyboy86]

It's an interesting topic, I though about a lot of guys and man that I know before this reply.
So I'm not afraid to lose my masculinity, but I'm afraid of not being able to express it, cause it's a part of me.
To be clear, I'm definitely not the most masculine around, but a profound reason is that acting masculine or feminine it's many times something stereotypical and I don't like stereotype in general.
On the other hand, being is a different question.

I'm me

For example 'm into Art, into Animals, into Knowledge and not into football, Are that things feminine?
Honestly for me Art and Knowledge are something too higher to simplify them and attributing them to one or another category. A thousand wouldn't be enough.
And I'm also so gentle to everyone, but for me it's education, and another thing is that I look very young.
I do not physical works but I don't dislike them, and I'm not so weak. In fact if I were able to do some work repairing car or as an electrician or similar I think I would try this type of job...

So I remember that when I was a kid, one of my bestfriend, my cousin, two years younger, was in love with a lot of kind of 'girly things', products that the marketing directed at young females, like Sailor Moon and other shoujo anime (his love, we always watched them and I was terribly bored XD), a kind of dance music etc. Now he lives with his boyfriend, for few years.

My behaviour is neutral, I'm happy to be a male, I never aimed at a female attitude.
And... boh.

[Tulloni]

I wasn't too bothered. I was never into football, sports, being some macho dumbarse anyway (really, who wants to be some arrogant showoff like Putin anyway?) so I wasn't all that bothered. Not that everyone who does sports is like that but there are some cliques who are like that. People who always feel they've got something to prove. Tbh I am sick of all that so I wasn't too worried about that. It's still not an issue for me. I know that even though I am not some ubermensch type person, I am still comfortable and secure in myself and that's what counts right?