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I'm having a confusing situation with a guy that might be my boyfriend. Half a year ago I broke up with my ex boyfriend. I'm 29 and he was 46. Our age difference was 17 years and it never bothered me one tiny bit. It never felt like he's too old for me or something.
The guy that I've met now, is 21. I like him and he likes me, but somehow all the time I feel like he's too young for me. I feel these 9 years between us very much. I would like us to be together, but I'm not sure will these relationships work. He seems to be smart and mature enough and everything, but I don't know..... Do you think 9 years is much or not?
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it's not the age difference that is the bother, it is the level of maturity and the place in life you are that are the bother.
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There 26 years difference here and we've been together coming up for 20 years, he's same age as my mom. we're happy and accepted by those that matter.
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I agree it has more to do with maturity.
I'm 36 and my bf is 27. We get along very well together. I'm a little childish and he's very mature so I tend to think our maturity level meets somewhere in the middle.
The thing that might be bothering you is that you are both rather young for a 9 year difference in age. If you were my age and he was my bf's age I really doubt you would see a problem. I don't have any attraction to guys younger than 24. Most men haven't really matured emotionally or physically enough at that age to pique my interest. I consider a 21 year old to be more of a college age kid who likes to get drunk and party. Not a man who is wise to the world and looking to settle down.
Just my two cents of course.
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The 9 year age difference, and your feelings towards him are due to the LTR you have just came out of with the ex. Its perfectly natural experience to be comparing both (no matter how much you don't want to!)
My current partner is 10 years younger than me. Works just fine - most of the time!
Good Luck
ObW
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I don't understand why people need advices on this kind of question. If it doesn't work, at least you would have tried and if it works, it's perfect.
I think that the main problem is that you seem to give an importance to the eyes of others. None can do anything about that except both of you.
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Okay, let me tell you this. Age is just a number...is a lie. Sometimes, age defines the stage of life they're at. I've posted something similar on a similar problem, but Ima just re-explain what I think.
The thing you're concern about is not necessarily all about age..after all, no would would bat an eye if a 41 year old is going out with a 49 year old. I think you're real concern is the stage of life you're both in. You're concern because he hasn't nearly seen the world as much as you have and it's understandable that you aren't comfortable about it.
Personally though, I feel like it'll work out because I don't think the 'life-stage' gap is that hug. I think if you both really like each other, you guys should atleast give it a go.
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give him a change stop letting the 9 years difference bother you long as hes not under 18 he might be a great guy and why let that pass it could be something nice
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You are not alone and this will not be a single problem
