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Settling to just be single..?
#21
You just have psychologically adjusted to endure the state of loneliness.

It happened to me some 6 years ago, and it's still my default mode...

just your basic unconscious self-defense mechanisms..

better to say to yourself "I'm ok being by myself" than waking up not wanting to breathe anymore cause you're so damn alone..I would know

Now, in the future, there is still always the chance of you finding someone...

and it just may be that being relaxed and cool pays off better than to be desperate or anxious about the whole relationship/dating situation
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#22
justbry87 Wrote:..Is that a thing?

I mean it's not for the lack of trying or anything, but I am
getting to the point that I am starting not to mind being by
myself. [relationship wise]

I used to feel real crappy every time my friends and I go our
separate ways and they go back home to their sig-other and I
come home to.. well, my room. Now, I don't feel good or bad
about it, it is just what it is.

I am starting to believe that relationships aren't for everyone
and that some people are just destined to be single for the rest
of their lives and there's nothing wrong with that.

I am perfectly content with the company of my friends and loved
ones and I just don't feel the need to keep thinking 'what-if' anymore.

I might be swayed again to think otherwise, but has anyone else ever
felt like this at one point or another?

I'm personally fine with being on my own. But I know what I want now. I didn't use to know what I wanted. I'd date someone then break up with them. I didn't know what I was doing then. But I'm serial about what I want if I want something I'll go for it. If I don't get it I'll either try again later or give up. Smile
Tho if I don't even find 'that someone' I'll just live with my mum. She's a total babe <3
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#23
southbiochem Wrote:You just have psychologically adjusted to endure the state of loneliness.

He didn't say he was lonely did he?
I think it's a great thing to be able content on your own. You shouldn't be sad or lonely when your are not in a relationship. A relationship is not what our goal in life should be. There's so much more to life than that!
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#24
davearoo Wrote:I'll admit that I'd much rather be with someone I can't live without than be alone.

However, I'd ALWAYS take being alone over settling for a mediocre someone I could just live with!

I'm with lots of people I can't live without
-My mum
-My 3 brothers
-My friends
-And my cat

All these people will be there for me threw thick and thin.
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#25
pellaz Wrote:will never happen

when it's right...you will know. things will fall into place and even during the "rough patches," as long as there's open communication, it will all work out in the end.

and also being able to laugh together!
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#26
Joshular Wrote:I'm with lots of people I can't live without
-My mum
-My 3 brothers
-My friends
-And my cat

All these people will be there for me threw thick and thin.

I meant "in the romantic sense," but having other people like these is important, too (of course).
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#27
davearoo Wrote:I meant "in the romantic sense," but having other people like these is important, too (of course).

Are you saying me and my mum aren't romantic?!
We totally are.
There are lots of ways to be intimate with people even if you are not having sex with them.
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#28
Joshular Wrote:Are you saying me and my mum aren't romantic?!
We totally are.
There are lots of ways to be intimate with people even if you are not having sex with them.

Okay, Oedipus, I'll back off. Rofl
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#29
davearoo Wrote:Okay, Oedipus, I'll back off. Rofl

n.n I juss sayn I take my mum on dates and every one be jellies cos she's so hot and such a babe!
It's still romance.
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#30
Joshular Wrote:Are you saying me and my mum aren't romantic?!
We totally are.
There are lots of ways to be intimate with people even if you are not having sex with them.

I will admit, as an American, I may just not be in the know here and maybe "Romance" has different connotations in New Zealand than in my country. I would never consider the flowers I buy for my mother on her birthday, for example, to be Romance. I do have intimacy with some of my family but the intimacy I hope to find with a romantic partner is different.

I give of myself in different ways when it comes to my romantic partners than my family. And, no, not like that. Well, yes like that, but not just like that. I guess it is harder to explain than I thought, going into this reply.
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