Hello,
My name is Daniel and I am new to GaySpeak  . I would like to take this time to tell you my coming out story, and maybe my story will influence and inspire you to come out to people you are closest too.
I will first off say that I started liking guys when I was in my senior year of high school. I thought a guy's hairstyle was cute and I found him attractive. From then on, things just kept on progressing and I started liking more guys. During that period of time, I was basically feeling really weird and I could see stars in my head. I thought something could be wrong with me.
I came out to my parents each separately, one night after the other. It was after work and my parents were driving me home when I told them. They are both very accepting of my sexuality, although my mom or dad aren't very enthusiastic about it. My dad makes sure that if I am with someone, I make sure to practice safe sex. He protects me and doesn't want me to get hurt.
Questions for all you readers:
1. When did you first come out and who did you come out to? How was your overall experience with your first time coming out?
2. If you haven't come out yet, what do you imagine your first coming out experience to be like?
3. For those of who you have come out, what advice would you give to someone who is scared and unmotivated to come out?
4. In your opinion, if you the LGBT community has the option of coming out, why don't heterosexual individuals come out as well?
Thank you for your time ,
Daniel
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
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wow...
thanks for sharing....its wonderful that you have suportive parents, albeit somewhat reticent..all in all I think they're awesome for being so caring to you...that's what parents are supposed to do how ever one turns out to be like...
1.- Actually...to 1 person not long ago...and I haven't had the guts to write it here...I will, though, cause it was feeling relief and feeling crushed at the same time...and people deserve to know
2.- Minus that one person, I'm still a closeted bastard...I just expect the worst, from anyone I tell (self-defense mechanism, that way I'm ready if it goes badly, or amazed beyond my expectations if it goes good)..
3.- yeah.....waiting on that...please....people...
4.- cause it's the "standard" and you don't declare yourself to be something you're expected to be...which is rather stupid.... I would totally like for example straight guys to make up a comedic scene and be like "mom, dad, I have something to tell you...I've been having feelings for a long time, feelings I can't understand"...."go on son"..and they start crying and wondering "what did we do wrong?" and he's like : "mom, dad, I LIKE GIRLS" and mom and dad go: " you ass***e"...that would be funny
Thanks for sharing Daniel! It's always comforting to know when coming out goes good! It gives us closet cases a bit more courage!
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southbiochem Wrote:wow...
thanks for sharing....its wonderful that you have suportive parents, albeit somewhat reticent..all in all I think they're awesome for being so caring to you...that's what parents are supposed to do how ever one turns out to be like...
1.- Actually...to 1 person not long ago...and I haven't had the guts to write it here...I will, though, cause it was feeling relief and feeling crushed at the same time...and people deserve to know
Congratulations on coming out! If you would like to tell me your coming out story, which I would love to hear, please don't be afraid to send it to me through PM .
2.- Minus that one person, I'm still a closeted bastard...I just expect the worst, from anyone I tell (self-defense mechanism, that way I'm ready if it goes badly, or amazed beyond my expectations if it goes good)..
Well, I love you and I accept you for who you are. Don't change for anyone. Be who you are.
3.- yeah.....waiting on that...please....people...
4.- cause it's the "standard" and you don't declare yourself to be something you're expected to be...which is rather stupid.... I would totally like for example straight guys to make up a comedic scene and be like "mom, dad, I have something to tell you...I've been having feelings for a long time, feelings I can't understand"...."go on son"..and they start crying and wondering "what did we do wrong?" and he's like : "mom, dad, I LIKE GIRLS" and mom and dad go: " you ass***e"...that would be funny
There is actually a little short film with that scenario in it.
Thanks for sharing Daniel! It's always comforting to know when coming out goes good! It gives us closet cases a bit more courage!
You are very welcome for sharing. Thank you for commenting and putting in your input. It is greatly appreciated.
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ForeverDorks Wrote:Questions for all you readers:
1. When did you first come out and who did you come out to? How was your overall experience with your first time coming out?
3. For those of who you have come out, what advice would you give to someone who is scared and unmotivated to come out?
I'm only out to a couple people right now but I'll share my experiences. The first for me was the easiest. It was to a relative that had already come out to me so I knew I wasn't going to be rejected. It was the second one, my mom, that was hard for me. Even though I kinda figured she would accept me, the fear of being rejected by someone I was so close to and the damage it would do to me was huge. In the end I think I was making too much a big deal out of it. Consider how they might take it based on past conversations. If it seems like they are prejudiced against gays I would make sure you have other family/friends that you know would be there for you in the event something did go wrong. I wish I could give better advice but since I'm new to all of it I don't want to lead you in the wrong direction. There are others here that I feel could be much more helpful than I
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That's a very encouraging story, and I think all of us are thankful to you for sharing it with us. My coming out was less conventional. I had no plan to come out, I was struggling with the issue of homosexuality throughout high school. Due to my brother's intense curiousity, he outed me after reading my journal. It was a long hard process, full of ridicule and hatred. My family was shocked and scared for me. Thankfully, my family is very supportive and I was not kicked out. I'm completely out now, and anyone who doesn't know can find out simply by asking me. It is a relief to come out, and I am much happier without the secrecy that was tearing me apart. I do believe that if you want to come out, do so with someone you feel safe with, and progress from there. It's scary to come out, but the reaction may suprise you. Sadly, not all coming outs end well, so make sure you know who your dealing with. As for straights, they don't come out because it is assumed that everyone is straight until stated otherwise. It's the norm of life, they have no reason to hide their sexuality or even discuss it.
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Thank you so much for your input!
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Thank you very much for your input!
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DandJforever Wrote:Hello,
My name is Daniel and I am new to GaySpeak . I would like to take this time to tell you my coming out story, and maybe my story will influence and inspire you to come out to people you are closest too.
I will first off say that I started liking guys when I was in my senior year of high school. I thought a guy's hairstyle was cute and I found him attractive. From then on, things just kept on progressing and I started liking more guys. During that period of time, I was basically feeling really weird and I could see stars in my head. I thought something could be wrong with me.
I came out to my parents each separately, one night after the other. It was after work and my parents were driving me home when I told them. They are both very accepting of my sexuality, although my mom or dad aren't very enthusiastic about it. My dad makes sure that if I am with someone, I make sure to practice safe sex. He protects me and doesn't want me to get hurt.
Questions for all you readers:
1. When did you first come out and who did you come out to? How was your overall experience with your first time coming out?
2. If you haven't come out yet, what do you imagine your first coming out experience to be like?
3. For those of who you have come out, what advice would you give to someone who is scared and unmotivated to come out?
4. In your opinion, if you the LGBT community has the option of coming out, why don't heterosexual individuals come out as well?
Thank you for your time ,
Daniel
If I may ask, what were your parents dipositons towards homosexuality before you coming out to them? I want to come out to my mom, I keep putting it off because I reason it's not important, but it very much is! I'm more asking for my boyfriend though, he might have some difficulty.... which makes me sad, both because it's putting him through a hard time, and because there's the possibility we won't see each other until he becomes self sufficient if they decide to sternly disapprove...Which honestly I think should be a goal before coming out to difficult parents, but now I'm taking the question away from you...
Ohhh, and I guess I'll trade questions for answers!
1) I first came out to a girl that wanted to date me, and I feel like it made us closer if that makes any sense. I've slowly started coming out to friends since then... to very positive responses. It makes me closer to friends for sure...Since I can be myself after I do.
2) Hmm. Since I've come out to friends, I'll answer for family. I think my mom might cry, and then be okay. I fucking it when she cries though, which is why I put it off so much. The rest of my family will do that "mild disapproving I'm glad you're not my kid" thing, but I don't mind that much.
3) Do it when it is SAFE. I'll never "come out" to my father, because when I lived with him, I would have been homeless had I come out. Parents like that don't need to know... and they lose their right to know if they're like this. But honestly, coming out to your close friends does make you closer... My best friend surprised me with her response when she found out I was dating a guy, I hope your friends will too.
4) Because everyone is hetoro by default in everyone's head, and we don't "come out" so much as correct misconceptions about our sexuality.
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that is great that your parents are supportive! I have not come out to mine yet and I know they would not be supportive at all.
1. However I did come out to my cousin and brother and they were both super supportive!
2. I imagine that coming out to my parents will be the worst thing ever.
3. Not enough experience to give solid advice.
4. Straight people should have to come out too. haha!
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