Really regretting who I lost my virginity to

[driftwood]

...you can just say it does not count because it wasn't with someone you wanted to be with.
And therefore give yourself the V-card again!

My first time was with someone I would rather have forgotten, so I did!

And I counted the next two times as losing my virginity (once to a woman, once to a man). In each of those two experiences I was definitely with someone I wanted to be with.

The "first" time should be something special, so you can have special feelings about that person. I don't feel bad at all about redefining when my "first" was.

[Joshular]

I lost mine to a random one night sand

[Rainbowmum]

Let it go sweetie .

[southbiochem]

Regardless of the discussion about the word "virginity" I would say the obvious: This is something you just can't change. It's done.

So, take this experience and learn from it so you don't repeat it and instead know to find what does you good.

Let it go, leave the past in the past and go search more meaningful experiences which you WILL remember more fondly.

[CellarDweller]

I would more or less understand if you had an equivalent of hymen (well, I'm even not sure), but it's not the case. You just had a bad experience, that's all, learn from it and enjoy the next ones!

Gotta say, I don't agree with this. A man who hasn't had sex with someone is just as much a virgin as a woman who hasn't had sex with someone. An intact hymen is not the lone marker of virginity.

Just my opinion, but I think guys give away their virginity much quicker than women, and I think a few (maybe more) to regret it at one point or another.

I didn't come out until I was 27, and had no self-confidence, and was 300 pounds. I knew I was not boyfriend material until I got myself strengthened, mind, body and soul.

End result was I didn't have my first sexual experience until 10 years later. Yes, I'm aware that I could've gone anywhere and had it, but I didn't want it that way.

My first time was with a man 12 years older than me. We were in a relationship, and I explained my situation to him, we were safe, he was kind, patient, and gentle, and never tried to rush or push me in anyway.

I have absolutely no regrets about that night, it is one of many good memories for me, even though we are not together anymore.

[megumidesu]

Gotta say, I don't agree with this. A man who hasn't had sex with someone is just as much a virgin as a woman who hasn't had sex with someone. An intact hymen is not the lone marker of virginity.

also , as a hymen can be broken by countless other things as well as sex (most girls will lose theirs years before they lose their virginity) , a hymen is actually a terrible marker of virginity

[Ekwarph]

Gotta say, I don't agree with this. A man who hasn't had sex with someone is just as much a virgin as a woman who hasn't had sex with someone. An intact hymen is not the lone marker of virginity.

Don't make me say what I have not said.

That's why I said "I'm even not sure". But there's no irreversible effect on losing one virginity like the hymen loss that is used in religious/traditional context (I don't say it's good, just it is).

I lost my virginity : I just had pleasure (or failed) with someone once, that's all. The important is the next time.

[megumidesu]

Don't make me say what I have not said.

That's why I said "I'm even not sure". But there's no irreversible effect on losing one virginity like the hymen loss that is used in religious/traditional context (I don't say it's good, just it is).

I lost my virginity : I just had pleasure (or failed) with someone once, that's all. The important is the next time.

while it is true that you can't get your virginity back once you've had sex , there is a surgical operation called a hymenoplasty (or just hymen reconstructive surgery) which rebuilds / replaces the hymen

[swalter]

Why are the details of your first time so important to you? Why is it having such a negative impact on your mental outlook?