My Angry Grouphome HatePost (getting shit out)

[Pix]

The place I had to stay at was worse than where you are. Much worse. And I, like other kids, got sent because a school psychologist got bounties by the group home per kid with insurance he got in (which he'd eventually get busted for by a PI hired by one of the scammed insurance companies which at the very least cost him his job at my school). I went in without psychological problems but came out of it months later with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder that haunted me for well over a decade and a half.

And there are group homes and such that were worse than the place I was locked up in.

At least you get to use a computer (where I was at you couldn't even mail a letter without them proofreading and approving it first). Btw, unless you "borrowed" a computer (that is of someone who works there while they were out of their office and they never realized you were on it) then be aware that finding out where you've been (and what you posted) is easy, and going by your description they will unless they're completely incompetent on top of everything else.

[James]

[quote=Rosie]Then of course there are those who are genuinely suffering and use self-harm as a way to feel. Anything.
That line right there sounds like my past, Thanks Rosie, for pointing that out, Jim

[Turnerdog]

(hi)

Yeah I know I shouldn't really be posting this kind of stuff on gayspeak but I thought I would anyways because I decided to treat this forum a little personally. So, I thought I'd post it...like, what the hell, maybe someone will find this interesting...I was really angry atm tho...it does sound kinda dumb, but what the hell.

Cuddly, I'm in the system because I thought I overdosed one day, ended up going to the hospital and tried to AWOL. They sent me to a mental hospital and when I got out they decided to send me to a grouphome in Fresno called 3 Rs. I didn't really listen at all so the end result was me getting stuck in the system for whats been 3 years now.

Pix, oh yeah? I wonder where you were at...sucks. Sounds intense. This place isn't exactly the worse place I've been to, but it definitely bites. What level was your place?

CCRox, hey watsup. I'll definitely stay connected. A little about me:
-17
-Ugly
-narcissistic, mature, and what I'd consider a typical teenager with typical problems.


Ivorybenz
Ignorant, huh? No, I'm not the slightest bit ignorant, but I'm only stating the truth.

Sorry if it's insensitive or rude.

A lot of people in my placement have attention seeking issues, that are kind of obvious, others not so much...
Yeah...

--
Nnyways, thanks for not flaming or flat-out rejecting this post, I know it's innapro-pro and actually kind of stupid, but I figured, why not?

[Pix]

Technically I was placed in a psychiatric hospital, though it was done privately, my dad's insurance was billed (the school psychologist worked it out so it would happen) and when my dad's insurance ran out the hospital sent out a form letter saying I was all better (wasn't it awkward that I was in isolations locked up with adults when Mom showed up with the form letter expecting to pick me up and the doctor in charge of me out of reach...)

Given that I'd just turned 13 I don't recall that it was given a level, though I vaguely recall there were 5 levels in the program. Starting at level 1 I wasn't allowed to wear my own clothes and was greatly restricted in what I could do and had to eat with the troublemakers and those who understandably tried to escape (who weren't allowed to leave the ward we were in at all whereas those at level 2 and higher got to go to a cafeteria in another building). One automatically rose to level 2 after a week or so unless they seriously acted out.

As it was I was tormented by older kids (many of them high school age) and staff alike (though I did annoy staff by acting out so that they'd lock me up in a room by myself so the high school kids couldn't torment me). There were lawsuits (don't recall any criminal charges being reported) over girls in the program getting pregnant and/or STDs (and not knowing for sure which staff member it was, though there were times boys & girls could also mix at certain times in a "commons" room, but that was strictly supervised...not that they stopped bullying, but I don't think they'd ever allow sex between kids). In my case I fought back against a staff guy who tried to make me suck him, got the crap beat out of me and put in isolations which is below level 1 so I'm not sure what level you'd call it. Despite it being called "isolations" (and also ICU, not sure what that stood for) I was locked up with adults of both genders as well as an older boy who'd also fought back against molestation by staff in the teen ward. It was also much worse than anything in the ward I'd been in and truthfully if I had it to do over I'd have sucked the guy's cock as many times as I had to stay out of there and get out of the program. The only thing that saved me was my Dad's insurance running out and their own flawed system (with a little luck).

I've heard of worse. The Christian homes are nightmares and they can even get away with killing kids (through starvation, beating, tying them down and they choke on their own vomit which came real close to happening to me in Isolations, accidental strangulation to death through restraints, and more), though some come under scrutiny for that and move their operations to some island or Mexico out of the US and keep accepting American kids (in one case a boy escaped and then made it back to America on a raft only to have the courts send him back). But here's an example of one that remains open in the US:

http://www.tampabay.com/news/publicsafet...es/1258390

Another one for girls, though no one died at this one:

http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/1...cd.01.html

TUCHMAN: Me'chelle Dowling is 20 years old. She just got out of the Hephzibah House a few years ago. Her parents thought the strict religious curriculum would make her a better Baptist.

ME'CHELLE DOWLING, FORMER HEPHZIBAH HOUSE STUDENT: They told me that, you know, it would be good for me and I'd make good life changing decisions.

TUCHMAN: Me'Chelle was only 12 and brand new in the house when she says two staff women told her to take off her clothes and forced her into a closet where a man would give what Hephzibah House claims is a medical examination.

DOWLING: They hold both my legs and both my arms down and let him do this to me. Stuck a speculum inside of me, and I was scared. I was screaming. I didn't want him to touch me. There was nothing I could do.

TUCHMAN: Both women talk about being forced to eat a lot of food, sometimes not being given any food, being forced to drink a lot of water. Susan says 28 girls shared three bedrooms on the upper floor of this house. There was one toilet. But --

GROTTE: If I stood up to go to the bathroom, no, you can only go to the bathroom when you're told.

TUCHMAN (on camera): These are big girls you were with?

GROTTE: Right.

TUCHMAN: What would happen if you went to the bathroom without asking?

GROTTE: You would be paddled, yes.

DOWLING: I would wet the bed every single night I was there. They made a spectacle of you like you were this horrible person for doing that. I ended up having to wear pull-ups every night. Would watch me put it on every night, and they'd make me show it to them when I would take it off in the morning.

TUCHMAN: It's been open a long time, lots of people have complained about getting beaten, emotionally tormented, and mentally tormented in the name of religion. And as a lot of us were very religious, we don't believe in hitting people, tormented them and having to wear diapers and making them drink and making them eat things they don't want to. I want to know why you do that?

DONALD WILLIAMS, HEPHZIBAH HOUSE: I prefer not to decline, sir.

TUCHMAN: But why can't you comment if you believe in what you do? This is your chance to tell viewers.

WILLIAMS: I understand that, but I prefer not to.

TUCHMAN: If you could tell me why? WILLIAMS: I'm respectfully declining.

TUCHMAN: Don Williams is also the pastor at the church on the Hephzibah House grounds. A former church-goer gave CNN a CD sold by the church in which Williams is apparently preaching his views about who is to blame when a male whistles at a female.

WILLIAMS: If you girls are walking down the sidewalk and some fellows drive by and they whistle, you better stop and think about that. What drew that whistle? Was it the way I was walking or maybe the way I was dressed or whatever? Did I do something to defraud those men?

TUCHMAN: Hephzibah's web site features pictures of girls who have attended and claims there are no spankings or any out of the ordinary punishments. This facility has been around for about four decades. It seems to be a thriving enterprise.

As you can see the people in charge don't particularly want to answer my questions. We're not alone. They don't really answer government either.

In Indiana group homes operated by churches and religious ministries are exempt from licensure. So nobody in the government even knows what's going on behind the closed doors. The women say their parents also had no idea what was going on there.

(on camera): In the 15 months that you were in this house, how many times did you leave the grounds to go somewhere else?

DOWLING: Never.

TUCHMAN: Zero?

DOWLING: Zero.

TUCHMAN: The Indiana governor's office says there's nothing it can do. The attorney general's office says it doesn't have jurisdiction and the same thing with the Indiana Department of Education.

(on camera): Notably though the Indiana Department of Child Services said it could investigate providing there was a current complaint and not from someone who already walked out of door.

We talked to a dozen women who say they were victimized at Hephzibah House, and they said they could never make any private phone calls or send uncensored letters while on the inside.

(voice-over): Hephzibah House is not the only facility of its kind. Across the country, victim advocates say there are an unknown, but large number of similar programs.

DOWLING: I have nightmares of it all the time. Like very vivid dreams like I'm trapped inside this house again and can't get out. That's like the only thing I want is to run out a door, and for some reason I can't

They get really creepy, even playing Bible verses over and over (more here) and whatever they did to a friend of mine who was sent came back 6 months later suffering severe delusions, including the belief that I'd try to recruit her into a cult (ironically they broke her spirit and made her a part of their cult, though her dad paid for the "treatment" after he read of her interest in Wicca in my friend's diary).

Don't get me wrong, I do sympathize with you, and was worried about you posting here, but it does get worse than where you're at.

[ChadCoxRox]

(hi)

Yeah I know I shouldn't really be posting this kind of stuff on gayspeak but I thought I would anyways because I decided to treat this forum a little personally. So, I thought I'd post it...like, what the hell, maybe someone will find this interesting...I was really angry atm tho...it does sound kinda dumb, but what the hell.

Cuddly, I'm in the system because I thought I overdosed one day, ended up going to the hospital and tried to AWOL. They sent me to a mental hospital and when I got out they decided to send me to a grouphome in Fresno called 3 Rs. I didn't really listen at all so the end result was me getting stuck in the system for whats been 3 years now.

Pix, oh yeah? I wonder where you were at...sucks. Sounds intense. This place isn't exactly the worse place I've been to, but it definitely bites. What level was your place?

CCRox, hey watsup. I'll definitely stay connected. A little about me:
-17
-Ugly
-narcissistic, mature, and what I'd consider a typical teenager with typical problems.


Ivorybenz
Ignorant, huh? No, I'm not the slightest bit ignorant, but I'm only stating the truth.

Sorry if it's insensitive or rude.

A lot of people in my placement have attention seeking issues, that are kind of obvious, others not so much...
Yeah...

--
Nnyways, thanks for not flaming or flat-out rejecting this post, I know it's innapro-pro and actually kind of stupid, but I figured, why not?

Don't apologize, the rawness is real and interesting even though it sounds like a lot o' crap to deal with at an age when you should have a totally different set of issues! Hugs buddy. Hang tight!

[ChadCoxRox]

Don't get me wrong, I do sympathize with you, and was worried about you posting here, but it does get worse than where you're at.

Thanks so much for taking the time for this post! That stuff was potent! And it made me feel better about the OP too!

[Pix]

That's also why I think kids in the US need to be very careful about coming out as gay to their parents, because in this country their parents can send them to such hellholes if they're under 18.

Most other civilized countries can't legally send them to such places anymore than they can hire someone to beat, rape, or kill their kids, the "treatment" is considered criminal (as it should be!) and the parents paying for it also share in the guilt. Not in the USA though.

[ChadCoxRox]

That's also why I think kids in the US need to be very careful about coming out as gay to their parents, because in this country their parents can send them to such hellholes if they're under 18.

Most other civilized countries can't legally send them to such places anymore than they can hire someone to beat, rape, or kill their kids, the "treatment" is considered criminal (as it should be!) and the parents paying for it also share in the guilt. Not in the USA though.

A program admission can't be made simply because of sexual preference, it's not diagnosable. So maybe you mean gay "in addition to other diagnosable issues"?? I process involuntary commitments regularly and you can't even get an admission based on gender identity disorder or other sex-related issues that can be diagnosed unless it is tied to something else "more serious."

[Pix]

A program admission can't be made simply because of sexual preference

Yes it can. Religious exemption laws means the state can't say anything and thus parents can pay to have their children tortured straight by good Christians. Example (emphasis added):

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/kat...for-christ

David, a 17-year old from Colorado, was taken in the middle of the night after coming out to his parents, and shipped off to be reprogrammed into a straight, born-again Christian. Tai, a 16-year-old Haitian-American girl from Boston, was sent away after acting out and experimenting with drugs as a result of childhood traumas. Beth, a 15-year old from Michigan, suffered from a debilitating anxiety disorder, and her parents were desperate to help her finish high school.

While in “the program” students were totally isolated, with little to no contact with the outside world, until Kate arrived with her camera. One brave student asked for her help to get free, and the ensuing struggles to secure his freedom revealed just how far this school would go to prevent their students from leaving.

See the video for more about being sent for being gay.

My friend was admitted (to a different Christian group home) solely for being interested in Wicca.

[Rosie]

Then of course there are those who are genuinely suffering and use self-harm as a way to feel. Anything.

That line right there sounds like my past, Thanks Rosie, for pointing that out, Jim

I am glad that my point resonated with you Jim. I cannot imagine what that must have been like for you, but I am glad that you made it and are here with us today.