My post was not a personal attack, it was an attempt to give you a quick education on sex, sexuality and how gender roles are perceived by society as a whole.
That you took it as a personal attack may be suggestive that the whole subject is a tender spot for you. I have little doubt that you have been attacked before thus most likely are prepared to be attacked.
I was coming from the general perspective of how society as a whole generally treats people based on their gender. I tried to shove as much into my 'wall of text' as I could trying to keep from writing a 'wall of text' (
since apparently it annoys people to read - right Cuddly?:tongue
Now I did throw in the word 'assume' a lot - to indicate that I have not been in contact with your therapist(s) and hormone doctor, thus I do not have your files to get an idea of you as an individual. So I had to make some assumptions based on what I have experienced and the tales of others who I have known and know.
I have about 48 years of experience on this god forsaken ball of mud. I'm a keen observer of the human species, further more I do have a little formal education in psychology and sociology - it was necessary when to get my D.Min since ministers are often counselors on top of spiritual advisers.
On top of that, as a gay male I had my own personal struggles with society and how it is less than accepting of LGBT in general. Instead of pouting and complaining I went the 'self education' route to get an understanding of why LGBT are treated they way they are.
I also have had a close relationship with at least one Tranny. One day I intend to write a book dedicated to her, the working title is 'My Momma Was a Black Man'.
She was a surrogate mother to me. If you knew my biological mother and her singular lack of maternal instinct, then you would understand just how important Momma was to me. Through her and her many friends (lets call them aunts and uncles to give an indication of how I felt about them) I was given an 'education' on how society treats transitioning individuals, both m-f and f-m.
Everything you said is 'typical' for transitioning people. M-F transitioning people tend to get it rougher than F-M ones. I was attempting to explain to you why. I hope that if you understood 'why' behind stuff that you will be able to protect yourself in future.
I'm not 'anti-trans G/S' - I freely admit that the chances of me getting into a lovers relationship with a m-f trans g/s is pretty low - but that has more to do with preferences of body types than my like or dislike of trans g/s.
Since there are two lesbians who I feel in at least infatuation with I will not rule out f-m Trans G/S.
My own take on bisexuality is that bisexuality is the norm, I adhere to the theory that most (not all) fall on a scale of bisexuality. Partially due to the 2 women who I was attracted to, largely due to the fact I'm at the very least well read if not somewhat educated.
Bisexuality: I was attempting to give you an idea of how bisexuals are treated and a peek into why they are treated the way they are. I also tried to give you a bit of insight of the types of guys who may be more prone to dating you and why.
The use of bisexuality as a 'stepping stone' from the closet to identifying oneself as 100% gay/lesbian is a well known phenomenon. It has consequences - such as that bisexuals are not treated as being 'real' - that a majority in both hetero and LGBT communities look down on bisexuals and make the assumption that a bi person is in their own 'transition' from closet to gay.
I know that human beings are a bit more crafty than they appear. While seemingly straight guys may appear to be attracted to you as 100% women, humans tend to be a bit more smarter than they behave. My guts tell me that they have picked up on subtle clues of your birth gender and they narrow in to target you.
One example is the voice box. A minor lump in the throat that most people do not consciously perceive, but we all know its there and we know what it means (your a dude). There are always going to be clues to your gender at birth. Medical science has come a long way, true, but total transition is still not possible.
I have a bit of fear that you will be used by more guys who are in their own sexual identity transition from closet to gay. Then there are the predatory types, those individuals who are not wholly healthy. It is not a nice thing, however if Momma and all of the other people's life experiences are any indicator it is 'par for the course'.
I also tried to explain gender roles and how people are treated based on what does or does not hang between their legs.
Like it or not as soon as you were born and the doctor announced 'Its a boy' your parents and everyone else around you started your programming as to what your gender means in society. You were wrapped in a blue blanket, dad most likely gave you a 'male' toy as your first gift, the parents immediately started planning your life around your penis, expecting you to grow up to be a man, marry a woman, have the 2.5 offspring, the suburban dream home and live up to expectations of being a male.
Everyone is treated to this process, one I call 'genderfication'. I am fully opposed to it, it strengthens the idea that women are someone less than than men. And inequality is still an issue in the 21st century.
While you may have been effeminate starting at some point in your early childhood, this does not mean you were treated like a girl. I suspect that there may have been a power struggle there. I do not know your parents but the typical way this runs is that the parents try to compensate and treat their child more based on the penis or lack there off thinking that if they instill gender roles harder that it will somehow magically make you fit the plumbing.
I draw once again on the life experiences and tales of other Trans G/S individuals I have known. And study of humans and reading way too many papers and articles on human sexuality.
So yes, I seriously doubt you have
full understanding of what it is to be treated like a girl. I do not say that to offend. And its neither a good thing nor a bad thing - it just is. You were born a boy - and the first three years of development are the strongest when it comes to 'programming'. Your program was decidedly male oriented. Regardless of who and what you are, you were treated as a boy. That will affect everything in your life to one degree or another.
You have (and always will have) a somewhat unique experience of being treated like a boy which will always stand in stark contrast of your being treated like a girl. You will therefore, be more aware of how people and society in general treats people based on their gender.
Again, I pull from the experiences of others. Psychology papers, education. This is not to insult you nor to make you feel less than. I say this to attempt to tell you how it all works.
You will also draw sick individuals to you. It is typical especially for m-f transitioning individuals who are pre-op. This is way too common and is a common complaint of transitioning people.
People use people. Sorry, its the nature of the beast. You are going to end up being used by a lot of people, perhaps more so due to your being where you are in your transition.
I don't like that, I honestly wish I could shield you from that. Since I can't the second best thing I can do is warn you and try to give you some of the years of my own life education to arm you with.
My intent was to give you a quick education on how things work. I do not view you as a freak, but I fear many will and they will treat you as such. I'm not the type to use people, but I fear that many will use you and since you are transitioning they will use that as well.
I would strongly suggest you get a circle of other Trans s/g individuals around you, and listen to their stories and their life experiences. I would also suggest you ask your therapist how these things work.
Cuddly: I'm sorry to inflict yet one more wall of text on you - forgive me?
I miss dating gay guys (rant)
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