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How to Flirt?
#11
Brett240 Wrote:OK, I do love carrots, but somehow that doesn't sound like your style just now. Keep it simple - and genuine. Make eye contact, hold eye contact for just a little longer than you might normally do. Smile. Compliment him sincerely and ask a question - like, You've got gorgeous hair, is it a lot of work to keep it looking that great? After a bit of conversation you could ask if you can touch it.
In conversation, lightly touch his hand or his arm to emphasize a point. Subtle can be intriguing.
I was at a party where this idiot decided that grabbing my friend's ass was a good way to flirt. He ended up with a fractured wrist.
Remember, subtle...

This is definitely something I can work towards and is totally my style. I will work on it, thank you for the tips.

I think I lost my confidence somewhere the past few years; maybe because I haven't dated in several years and I've lost touch.
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#12
Freak Wrote:I don't wanna sound cocky, but.. I've never needed to flirt cause there are always enough men and women who try to flirt with me.

The other reason is: I love good looks, for sure. However, only good looks never tell you almost anything about their personality. So, I just enjoy their good looks and that's all. I don't see any need to flirt with them.

I have men who try and flirt with me. The problem is I don't know how to flirt back. I get very shy and my brain freezes up.
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#13
Uneunsae Wrote:I have men who try and flirt with me. The problem is I don't know how to flirt back. I get very shy and my brain freezes up.

Just be yourself and don't worry about anything! That's my case.

I never dress myself up as if I were someone else than myself. Well.. of course you wanna get a better compliment or attention. I understand it. However, if the flirt partner is only looking at my face and don't care about my personality (who I really am), he doesn't deserve my interests.


If you're shy. Be shy and do it your way. There's nothing wrong with it! Your real partner will accept it and he'll even know how to handle you Wink
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#14
Freak Wrote:If you're shy. Be shy and do it your way. There's nothing wrong with it! Your real partner will accept it and he'll even know how to handle you Wink

That is a VERY good point! Kitty
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#15
I think I'm kinda socially awkward so it's also difficult for me to flirt. :/

But we're not the only ones. Might be difficult for lots of people.
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#16
I am a natural flirt which is why I was a good bartender.....

I think the secret is to turn off your mind and just go with the flow...it is more like an energy and vibe thing versus something you think about

It can be kinda like doing a dance with someone...and it is intuitive... for me anyway..

Maybe if you feel sexy and BE that person it will help....and probably if you feel sexy you will more easily tune into and feel the sexy part of the other guy.
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#17
East Wrote:I am a natural flirt which is why I was a good bartender.....

I think the secret is to turn off your mind and just go with the flow...it is more like an energy and vibe thing versus something you think about

It can be kinda like doing a dance with someone...and it is intuitive... for me anyway..

Maybe if you feel sexy and BE that person it will help....and probably if you feel sexy you will more easily tune into and feel the sexy part of the other guy.

^ this. I don't even need to write anything now, this is perfect
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#18
Uneunsae Wrote:Since I'm very shy, I don't really know how to flirt. I don't know what things are okay and what would be creepy.

Example: Today I saw a fellow Native guy with very pretty long braids. He works in a jewelry shop I've gone to a few times. I'm quite sure he recognizes me after a few times. I'm a sucker for long hair and I wanted so much to ask him if I could touch his hair. I'm afraid it would come of as creepy though.

No, don't ask people to touch their hair because that would definitely come off as creepy to some, including me. If it was someone I knew prior to that moment, such as a friend, I wouldn't mind. But asking a complete stranger that is a big no-no. Complimenting is always a start, you could've said "I really like your hair, man!" then use that as a conversation starter, smiling and eye-contact are also important when flirting.

I used to be shy as well in the past, but like others have said it works to be in the moment and go with the flow, not over-thinking things too much. It's certainly easier if there is mutual attraction there. Also, people have different flirting styles and the norms for flirting are culturally different in a lot of places. I for one like to joke around with the person, tease them a little bit, make fun of them in a playful way. I also like to do light physical contact (putting hand on their back or shoulder, etc.), get closer if we happen to be dancing, etc. It all depends on the vibe and if there is mutual attraction there.
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#19
Sensei Wrote:I for one like to joke around with the person, tease them a little bit, make fun of them in a playful way. I also like to do light physical contact (putting hand on their back or shoulder, etc.), get closer if we happen to be dancing, etc. It all depends on the vibe and if there is mutual attraction there.

Listen to Sensei posters!! This is what you should set out to do! But again I guess it depends on the person you're trying to flirt with. You have to relax and be comfortable otherwise you will come across a tool trying too hard.
[COLOR="Purple"]As I grow to understand less and less,
I learn to love it more and more.
[/COLOR]
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#20
Don't forget to smile. It doesn't have to be a huge smile but more like just something that tells them when you look at them that they make you feel.... good, happy, pleasant, interested, shy, etc.

Smiles and eye contact go a long way. Especially with people like me who are socially awkward to begin with. I will catch a smile and eye contact right away. Where something more blatant such as touching, teasing, etc might pass me right by unnoticed.
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