My coming out journey > Positive > Hope it helps some people

[hasher22]

Hey guys,

I had a very positive, easy and very supportive coming out experience.

I am 26, Filipino born with a Filo/Chinese background but Australian bred when I was 1. I am not the most masculine fella, not the most feminine either. Most people can tell I am gay but most people can't tell I'm gay and apparently they are shocked when I say I am.

Up to the age of 24, I always denied I was gay because of abuse I might get. I was so wrong.

The first people I ever told I was gay is when I got a new job when I was 24, one of my workmates asked "are you gay?" I was not offended but speechless because I never said yes to anyone and always said no. So after maybe 7 seconds not saying anything, I said yes. My workmates were really positive and chilled about it, and started making funny gay jokes and I played. It was fun. I really loved my workmates.

2nd person I decided to tell was one of my best friends, we were having coffee and I said it so casually (because my workmates took it so great that it really made me feel comfortable just to slip it into the conversation) "hey, I like dick". Yes I said that, we're best friends lol. She said "and?" We both laughed and I replied "seriously, I am gay" and we both laughed again and she started asking 101 questions about me. We are tighter than ever before.

3rd person I decided to tell was my brother. One night my friends and himself were going clubbing, while were both in the kitchen eating, I just casually said to him, "hey, just before we go out, I'm gay"..... My brother smiled and hugged me. He said "I know". I laughed and we both went clubbing and had a great night.

Ok, you know how I know my brother knows I am gay? When I was about 16, remember those days when you had to backup your files on a CD on your computer? Well I backup my gay porn on a cd and labelled it Counter Strike (if anyone does not know what it is, it's a first person shooter game). My brother needed to install it again and found the CD. 5 minutes later, he gave it back to me and said "the disk is broken". I looked at the disk and that's when I knew, he knew I was gay. lol. Awkward!!!

4th and last person that I came out to was my mum. Now she was the very last person out of everyone that I was afraid to tell. Because I got some tattoos I have hidden away from her for 1 year and I finally showed her. She cried the whole night because I cursed my body. Coming out to her might break her heart. But I went for it, 22nd Dec 2013, I had lunch with her at home and we started to talk. And I said it, "mum there's something I got to say........ I'm gay"........ She stared at me. Looked me in my eye and said "Oh that's cool". I was like "that's cool!?!?!", hahahaha! Laughed so hard and we chatted about homosexuality, sex, boyfriends and all that stuff.

I don't talk to my father since I was 10 so he's out of the picture.

If anyone is deciding to come out, do it at your own time and at your own pace. Mine was very positive and I never been so happy in my life. New people I talk to are accepting of my sexuality and it does filter the people that are homophobes.

It is a milestone for anyone to come out, it's a huge weight off my shoulders and I hope anyone that comes out has the same experience as me.

I have not lost any friends and the straight friends that I thought were homophobes actually do talk to me when we go out.

I had to take that risk with my workmates first to get that little experience then going to my friends and family.

Good luck to anyone coming out and I wish you all the best, stay positive.

[CellarDweller]

thanks for sharing your story! I'm glad you had such a great experience with it!

[Adam]

Thanks for sharing your experience. Too often, all we hear are the horror stories --- it's great to hear that your co-workers, family and friends were so accepting.
I was very young (16) when I came out and very defiant --- so I met mixed reactions. I'm sure if I had waited a bit and been less obnoxious, it would have gone better lol -

[princealbertofb]

Hello, Hasher22, and to GaySpeak. Glad your coming out experience was a positive and supportive one. We make the world of this, and sometimes it's not so bad, which is a good thing.

This sentence is really strange, though : "Most people can tell I am gay but most people can't tell I'm gay and apparently they are shocked when I say I am.
" What did you mean?

[princealbertofb]

I think most people you hang out with will find it refreshing that you're honest with them. Honesty is key here. Bravo.

[50Plus]

Awesome story, thanks for sharing.

I do like how you did it on your own terms and it sounds like you presented it in a manner that was most favourable to the listener. It is a skill of the master communicator.

Well done, most want to make the coming out experience about them, and overlook the impact on the others in their lives.

You could be inspiration for others.

[deepu69]

Thank you!!!