He's done a glare and stare and a shirt flip ... now what?
07-28-2014, 04:50 AM
I am a 28-year-old gay male, and I am thoroughly confused about interactions with a 42-year-old colleague.
We work in separate departments that collaborate from time to time. About a year ago, we were both assigned to the same project. I discover we share similar interests. He stares at me intensely in the conference room. He gazes at me while others are talking. I assume he may be attracted to me, but he's married, and I stay away.
Nine months ago, I notice him walking toward the coffee cart as I am leaving. He watches me, eyes locked on mine, mouth hanging open. I keep going. About six months ago, I am leaving a colleague's office when I notice him in the hall. He does a "glare and stare" move on me, his feet pointed toward me and his eyes bulging in my direction, almost comically. No one, my last boyfriend included, has ever looked at me like this. He peacocks, accentuating his body. I am caught off guard and leave the hall. I wonder if he realizes how he looks at me.
We have a one on one meeting a few weeks later. I hope it will give me more clarity, but it complicates things even more. I do most of the talking at first, and when he does speak up, his tone is much quieter and reserved than usual. He's a Leo with a big personality who loves praise, but that day he measures his words and fidgets in his chair. He stares at my nipple in my crew neck. I bring the meeting to a close, and he stalls, trying to keep the conversation going. He says goodbye to me five different ways. He's never this over zealous. And as I'm leaving I realize he didn't use my name once.
A few weeks later, I see him at a cross-departmental meeting with eight other people. He sits next to me, tripping over the words in his introduction. As the meeting continues, he's breathing so heavily I can hear him. He nervously flips up his shirt tail while seated. When he walks by the screen in front of me, he flips up his shirt tail several times while staring at me. When talking with other people, he's clipped and pointed, but with me, he takes his time. He defends me during the meeting.
I am notified we will be working on another project in September. I send him an email to sign off on something. I give him a few days. I re-email. He's been on vacation. He tells me he'll respond in a day, but takes a week. He misspells my name in his response.
I think there could be a bisexual or gay man within his straight exterior, but he's enigmatic in many ways. Do you think he has feelings, or do you think he's simply having fun? Should I avoid working with him in the future?
We work in separate departments that collaborate from time to time. About a year ago, we were both assigned to the same project. I discover we share similar interests. He stares at me intensely in the conference room. He gazes at me while others are talking. I assume he may be attracted to me, but he's married, and I stay away.
Nine months ago, I notice him walking toward the coffee cart as I am leaving. He watches me, eyes locked on mine, mouth hanging open. I keep going. About six months ago, I am leaving a colleague's office when I notice him in the hall. He does a "glare and stare" move on me, his feet pointed toward me and his eyes bulging in my direction, almost comically. No one, my last boyfriend included, has ever looked at me like this. He peacocks, accentuating his body. I am caught off guard and leave the hall. I wonder if he realizes how he looks at me.
We have a one on one meeting a few weeks later. I hope it will give me more clarity, but it complicates things even more. I do most of the talking at first, and when he does speak up, his tone is much quieter and reserved than usual. He's a Leo with a big personality who loves praise, but that day he measures his words and fidgets in his chair. He stares at my nipple in my crew neck. I bring the meeting to a close, and he stalls, trying to keep the conversation going. He says goodbye to me five different ways. He's never this over zealous. And as I'm leaving I realize he didn't use my name once.
A few weeks later, I see him at a cross-departmental meeting with eight other people. He sits next to me, tripping over the words in his introduction. As the meeting continues, he's breathing so heavily I can hear him. He nervously flips up his shirt tail while seated. When he walks by the screen in front of me, he flips up his shirt tail several times while staring at me. When talking with other people, he's clipped and pointed, but with me, he takes his time. He defends me during the meeting.
I am notified we will be working on another project in September. I send him an email to sign off on something. I give him a few days. I re-email. He's been on vacation. He tells me he'll respond in a day, but takes a week. He misspells my name in his response.
I think there could be a bisexual or gay man within his straight exterior, but he's enigmatic in many ways. Do you think he has feelings, or do you think he's simply having fun? Should I avoid working with him in the future?
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Sagittarius
