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Too fast or just right timing?
#1
When you reach a certain age you already know what you want; and so when you meet someone who also knows what he wants, things or expectations between you and that person moves at a lot faster pace! having said that I recently met someone (totally single) that have being very open about himself, his past, hopes and dreams, and one who have being extremely honest about his feelings towards me, and admittingly I too feel the same towards him! there seems to be an instant chemistry between us!? we have so much in common, our relationship experiences are so paralleled, shared values and morals, and although we are still not sexually involved, we seem to have similar tastes and wants of what we expect in that department! I also feel extremely comfortable and quite safe in his presence. But we both agreed to put more emphasis on each other's emotional and spiritual side first before we become sexually involved with each other.

I haven't felt this way about someone, or the real possibilities at being involved in a worthwhile relationship in a long time! last time I felt this way was when much younger. Only that this time around I know what I am getting into and what to expect, unlike when younger, everything I've felt was full of insecurities! I admit to being a bit cautious, but even this feeling feels right!?
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#2
If everything feels right....and you know it....carpe diem.

Both of you need to agree to jump in feet first and enjoy.
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#3
I fell into a relationship really fast once, even though we both were really wary of things falling off the rails. We jokingly compared it to a sci-fi movie scene when the spaceship has "explosive decompression", with both of us being dragged along while we try digging our fingernails into the floor and try our damnedest to keep it from happening. Smile

I think the biggest danger isn't the speed so much as the potential to overlook or dismiss potential problems. 16-year-olds who "fall in love" tend to think "who cares as long as we're in love?" Older and wiser folks are more apt to recognize potential issues, and (hopefully) take steps to minimize them or handle them. As long as you're doing that, I don't see any issue. Smile

Lex
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#4
Congrats Leandro!
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#5
Rareboy Wrote:If everything feels right....and you know it....carpe diem.

Both of you need to agree to jump in feet first and enjoy.

Communication is an extremely attractive characteristics I look for in someone! we both already had a heart to heart talk about our past relationship experiences, and what we expect in a future one! I've already told him that I wouldn't do what he doesn't feel ready or comfortable doing! so far I like this "slow dancing" approach to dating! I do feel there already is a strong sexual attraction between us, so in that sense I know when the time comes it is going to feel natural and right! there is only one impediment!? we live an hour away from each other! he lives in Queens, NY and I live in New Jersey!
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#6
My sincerest condolences on the loss of your freedom. :tongue:
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#7
LEANDRONJ Wrote:............ Only that this time around I know what I am getting into and what to expect, unlike when younger, everything I've felt was full of insecurities! I admit to being a bit cautious, but even this feeling feels right!?

Lexington Wrote:............ 16-year-olds who "fall in love" tend to think "who cares as long as we're in love?" Older and wiser folks are more apt to recognize potential issues, and (hopefully) take steps to minimize them or handle them. As long as you're doing that, I don't see any issue. Smile
Lex

I'm living proof of all that except I was 19 going on 20 when it happened and the older I get the easier it is for me to see just how immature, unprepared and STUPID I was about falling in love and thinking in terms of forever and all that.

That's got a lot to do with why I've just about stopped giving relationship advice to young guys. I don't want to the give them false hopes or set them up for failure. I'm beginning to see my story about falling in love and making a relationship out of it isn't a good example for others because it was really a one in ten billion success story. The older I get now the more I have these flashbacks about tough past events when I sit back dazed wondering, "how the hell did all that work out to get to where we are now?"
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#8
Bowyn Aerrow Wrote:My sincerest condolences on the loss of your freedom. :tongue:

Lol! :flirty-thank-you-sm I like the feeling of being tied up behind each love knot that tightens up the loose ends of feeling lonely!
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#9
Virge Wrote:I'm living proof of all that except I was 19 going on 20 when it happened and the older I get the easier it is for me to see just how immature, unprepared and STUPID I was about falling in love and thinking in terms of forever and all that.

That's got a lot to do with why I've just about stopped giving relationship advice to young guys. I don't want to the give them false hopes or set them up for failure. I'm beginning to see my story about falling in love and making a relationship out of it isn't a good example for others because it was really a one in ten billion success story. The older I get now the more I have these flashbacks about tough past events when I sit back dazed wondering, "how the hell did all that work out to get to where we are now?"

And such is Love my dear friend! there are no right or wrong answers on how to approach it and embrace it! my secret is to just let it flow naturally, and try to work around any impediments that may jeopardize that once in a life time experience of being in love! the only issue we are dealing with is the inconveniences of the distances, time, and traffic between us! but I know lots of happily together couples that started out that way!! so there is hope for me!
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#10
Virge Wrote:I'm living proof of all that except I was 19 going on 20 when it happened and the older I get the easier it is for me to see just how immature, unprepared and STUPID I was about falling in love and thinking in terms of forever and all that.

That's got a lot to do with why I've just about stopped giving relationship advice to young guys. I don't want to the give them false hopes or set them up for failure. I'm beginning to see my story about falling in love and making a relationship out of it isn't a good example for others because it was really a one in ten billion success story. The older I get now the more I have these flashbacks about tough past events when I sit back dazed wondering, "how the hell did all that work out to get to where we are now?"

The one in ten billion success stories is a reflection of one's own character! if you play with people's feelings, is dishonest, and hurtful; your chances for love and to be loved is virtually none existent, in comparison to those who finds joy and satisfaction in loving and being loved by someone!

In my case I already love myself enough that is able to love someone the way I have learned to love myself! in all my past relationships, good or bad, I may temporarily feel different, but in the long run I come out a much loving and sweeter person! this guy and I have already being there and back, as such we have learned not to take surprises or differences as a shock, but rather as barometer to our level of maturity! in other words I am sure nor him or I will get mad or resentful of differences, but rather become more compassionate of each other's uniqueness!
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