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i need help
#1
hey guys my name is chris or you can call me cnorwood4350. that is my username. i would perfer you call me chris. so anyways i am new and i need some help. i have been going through life day by day wondering what is the next chapter of my life but right now i have a problem. i go out side everyday and i try to do new things or i will watch movies but the problem is that i cant seem to find a boyfriend who i can sleep with at night and call my lover. all my friends call me queer and faggot and all kinds of names but i cant seem to know why. they all know i am gay but they keep treating me like crap. what do i do? how do i react to that kind of stuff and how do i find a boyfriend. i have been lonely for too long and i cant take it anymore. i wish i could be in a relationship now. what do i do?
what do you guys think? if you can help me please message me back.
thanks chris
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#2
cnorwood4350 Wrote:hey guys my name is chris or you can call me cnorwood4350. that is my username. i would perfer you call me chris. so anyways i am new and i need some help. i have been going through life day by day wondering what is the next chapter of my life but right now i have a problem. i go out side everyday and i try to do new things or i will watch movies but the problem is that i cant seem to find a boyfriend who i can sleep with at night and call my lover. all my friends call me queer and faggot and all kinds of names but i cant seem to know why. they all know i am gay but they keep treating me like crap. what do i do? how do i react to that kind of stuff and how do i find a boyfriend. i have been lonely for too long and i cant take it anymore. i wish i could be in a relationship now. what do i do?
what do you guys think? if you can help me please message me back.
thanks chris

Welcome Chris.

Why not try getting involved in the gay community? You could go to the nearest gay community / youth center and you could meet others who you could relate to in person.
Reply

#3
cnorwood4350 Wrote:hey guys my name is chris or you can call me cnorwood4350. that is my username. i would perfer you call me chris. so anyways i am new and i need some help. i have been going through life day by day wondering what is the next chapter of my life but right now i have a problem. i go out side everyday and i try to do new things or i will watch movies but the problem is that i cant seem to find a boyfriend who i can sleep with at night and call my lover. all my friends call me queer and faggot and all kinds of names but i cant seem to know why. they all know i am gay but they keep treating me like crap. what do i do? how do i react to that kind of stuff and how do i find a boyfriend. i have been lonely for too long and i cant take it anymore. i wish i could be in a relationship now. what do i do?
what do you guys think? if you can help me please message me back.
thanks chris
Hi Chris, welcome to GS. I'm sorry it took two weeks for someone to reply to your cry for help. Stories like yours really make me sad. It's terrible. So, my first suggestion right now is that you come back and visit us and talk with us some more. I know you're hurting and confused and don't know what to do. It isn't as simple as someone just saying, "hey, do this…" or whatever. As for boyfriends, well, lets take things one step at a time. I know that's what you want but what you need right now are friends who do NOT judge you and call you names. People who are abusive to you are not your friends. You know that, right? They may be the only people you know so you *think of them* as "friends" but they're not really. Friends don't treat one another that way.

So… Come back and talk with us. Tell us more about what is going on in your life. Are you still in high school? Are you living with your family? What is that like?

Best, Mike
.
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#4
Hey Chris.

At 18, you have a lot of life ahead of you. Instead of worrying about a bf, spend your time building yourself into the kind of guy that other guys will want as a bf.

In doing this, you will very likely get involved in activities and with other guys that can lead to connecting with the 'right' ones. And notice I wrote 'ones' and not one. Get out there and meet as many guys as you can to broaden your experience and circle of friends.
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#5
If all of your friends disrespect you in the ways that you describe, maybe your first priority should be to make new friends...either among the gay community or even among those who don't share your orientation but are open and caring. If you surround yourself with friends who are gay or gay-friendly...well, even if you don't find a BF among them, they all have friends and acquaintances, and the circle continues to widen.

I know that making new friends can be daunting, but you said that you like to go out and do things...maybe try doing things that are more likely to bring you in contact with compatible people...
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#6
Traverse City, unlike other northern Michigan towns, has a gay bar. It is called Side Traxx and you have probably heard of it. Even though Michigan is one of the states still left that allow those 18 to 20 to be in a bar, most bars still go with 21 and over, so this would probably not be an option for you.

I do not know if you are religious or not, and I do not think it would matter in allowing you to attend, but here is an lgbt Christian group that meets every Wednesday evening.

https://agapefellowshiptc.wordpress.com

https://www.facebook.com/AgapeLgbtFellowship?fref=ts
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#7
cnorwood4350 Wrote:...the problem is that i cant seem to find a boyfriend who i can sleep with at night and call my lover. all my friends call me queer and faggot and all kinds of names but i cant seem to know why. they all know i am gay but they keep treating me like crap. what do i do?

Actually, the problem is that you have some pretty dickish friends. A little "good natured ribbing" isn't such a big deal, but if they're treating you like crap, then you need to let them go. Holding on to terrible friends is like clinging to a metal safe during a shipwreck because "that's all I have". No - you'd be better served letting that bastard sink and try to paddle on your own for awhile. Smile

Lex
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#8
Join a gay youth group and make new friends.
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