Are we the ones with dementia?

[LONDONER]

These did not happen to me. Wild horses would not drag me in to McDonalds, I just picked them up from another forum.

ONE
Recently, I when to McDonald's and I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets.

I asked for a half dozen nuggets.

'We don't have half dozen nuggets,' said the teenager at the counter.

'You don't?' I replied.

'We only have six, nine, or twelve,' was the reply.

'So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?'

'That's right.'

So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets

(Unbelievable but sadly true...)

(Must have been the same one I asked for sweetener and she said they didn't have any, only Splenda and sugar.)

(And they think they are worth $15.00 per hour)

TWO
I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those dividers that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the divider, looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it.

Not finding the bar code, she said to me, 'Do you know how much this is?'

I said to her 'I've changed my mind; I don't think I'll buy that today.'

She said 'OK,' and I paid her for the things and left.

She had no clue to what had just happened.

(But the lady behind me had a big smirk on her face as I left)


THREE
A woman at work was seen putting a credit card into her DVD drive and pulling it out very quickly.

When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM thingy.

(Keep shuddering!!)



FOUR

I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car.

'Do you need some help?' I asked.

She replied, 'I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door un-locker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?'

Hmm, I don't know. Do you have an alarm, too?' I asked.

'No, just this remote thingy,' she answered,handing it and the car keys to me.

As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, 'Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk....'

PLEASE just lay down before you hurt yourself !!!



FIVE
Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, 'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?' 'Just use paper from the photocopier', the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five blank copies.

Brunette, by the way!!



SIX
A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid had eaten ants.

The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and he should be fine, the mother says, 'I just gave him some ant killer......'

Dispatcher: 'Rush him in to emergency right now!'

[jaxc]

Oh god! I think i can literally feel my brain cells dying as i read this, and the scary thing is, these people have the right to vote, gulp!:biggrin:

[CellarDweller]

some of these are just so sad......

but I can't criticize, I've done some stupid stuff of my own.

I can recall getting out of my car, going up the porch steps, and then standing at the house door, aiming my car key fob at it, and pressing the 'unlock' button over and over, wondering why it wasn't unlocking.

LOL

[Butterfingers]

We all have our dumb moments, I remember aiming a key fob at my front door, when I pushed the button my car behind me on the street beeped.

I think that's called "preoccupied". I have found my self wrapped up in deep thought on my way home from work and driving 2 or 3 miles past my turn before I realized it.

Getting back to the stories posted, I worked with guys in a machine shop, some claimed to have had 2 or 3 years of college, some couldn't read a tape measure. I was so glad to retire.

[Pyromancer]

...and here's #7 (actually happened to me...)

I was in a Radio Shack in a state that has a 5% sales tax. The stressed-out clerk said she couldn't sell me what I needed because the register was down. I told her that all my info was in the system and that I'd write down my name and leave her the exact change to ring up later.

She looked confused and told me it wouldn't work because we had no idea what the sales tax would be...I said. The price is $4.99, 5% tax which is a quarter, I owe you $5.24...

She looked dubious and glanced at her co-worker, who nodded and rolled his eyes...the girl turned back to me and said. "That's awesome!! You're amazing at math!!" ...

[ShiftyNJ]

I follow the passenger ship industry and they frequently shared some of the funny things people ask the crew, such as:

"Which elevator goes to the front of the ship?"

and

"Is the water in the pool fresh or salt"
"It's salt, sir."
"Oh, that explains why it's so rough."

There was an announcer on one of the first generation of Royal Caribbean ships who used to love to mess with people by making off-the-wall announcements over the PA.

"Attention passengers, as you know we will be several hours late arriving at St. Thomas. We are going as fast as we can and need to stress that repeatedly flushing your cabin toilet will not make the ship go faster."

[ShiftyNJ]

...and here's #7 (actually happened to me...)

I was in a Radio Shack in a state that has a 5% sales tax. The stressed-out clerk said she couldn't sell me what I needed because the register was down. I told her that all my info was in the system and that I'd write down my name and leave her the exact change to ring up later.

She looked confused and told me it wouldn't work because we had no idea what the sales tax would be...I said. The price is $4.99, 5% tax which is a quarter, I owe you $5.24...

She looked dubious and glanced at her co-worker, who nodded and rolled his eyes...the girl turned back to me and said. "That's awesome!! You're amazing at math!!" ...

I was in Hollister (I know! It was a long time ago!) and they had to close because the register didn't work right. The idea of adding up an order or making change was beyond the "brand representatives'" comprehension.

[MikeW]

LOL... One time I was ordering a sandwich at a deli, explaining to the young guy behind the counter what I wanted on it. I was maybe two or three ingredients ahead of him and he stopped me saying, "You might as well not tell me, I'll just forget..." IOW, wanting me to do this one item at a time. So, being the snarky SOB I am, I snapped back, "What's the matter, short term memory shot already?" He didn't take that too kindly but I did get my ham and cheese with pickle, lettuce, tomato, mayo and "light on the mustard" TYVM.

Now, to be fair, I have definitely had those "dumb" moments -- and these were years ago when I was much younger so this isn't about age.

Onetime I walked into an ice-cream parlor and ordered an ice-cream cone, paid for it and waked out the door. I'd gotten a bit down the block when behind me I hear a young man yelling, "Hey Mr. Don't you want your ice cream?" o.0

Another time, this was back in the day when credit cards got run through a little back-and-forth press like thing, imprinting a paper credit card receipt one had to sign. I'm made my purchase, the card was imprinted, and the clerk handed me the paper -- and for the F'n life of me *I could not remember my name!* It was like whatever 'automatic' thing kicks in to sign a check or receipt like this was just *missing* from my brain. Within a couple seconds, of course, it came back but still, there was that *moment* of simply staring blankly at the paper. OMFG :eek:

[meridannight]

one time when i was in a groceries store i was buying cakes that had a caramel cream topping. the problem was, the store only had these paper bags to put them into (it was a self-service counter where you took what you wanted and had to put it on the scale which automatically calculated the price and gave you the bar code for it). the obvious issue being, that caramel topping sticks to the paper bag and you'll lose most of it, the cakes will be a mess by the time you take them out of the bag. so i asked one of the staff to give me a plastic box to put them into. everything went fine till i got to the cashier. she studied the box and the cakes in there from every angle. then she looked at the price tag, and after a considerable passage of time asked me how i had weighed the items. i told her i placed a bottle of Coca-Cola (the largest size, several times heavier than those cakes and one of the other things i bought) on the scale and priced them with that. she still didn't understand, even after that, as if i'd just tried to explain advanced math to her or something. how do you weigh cakes in a plastic box on the scale, apparently it's a mystery.

[Camfer]

I needed to verify my identity over the phone with my cell provider, so the customer service rep asked me my response to the security question, "What is your favorite food?" I'd set that up years before and had no idea what was my favorite food 10 years ago.

"Navel Oranges?" I guessed.

"No," was her response.

"Tomatoes?" I tried again.

"Sir," she said, "I asked you your favorite food. Those aren't food. Those are like a fruit and a vegetable."

I was astounded. Oranges and tomatoes aren't food? "Okay, could you help me out by giving some examples of food?"

"Food is like mac and cheese, or pizza."

I couldn't stop laughing. Finally she gave up and had me read some code from beneath the battery so we could move on.