Monogamous in a Polyamorous Relationship

[Pacific]

This thread serves as an important reminder to me that it is true that I am able to understand many things on an intellectual level and know it is absolutely logical; however, on an emotional level, it does not work...it's somewhere in there that the two need reckoned.

[putresVigil]

I don't buy that you are okay with him being with someone else sexually or otherwise. You are trying too hard to make us believe that, but if you are honest with yourself, even you are not convinced. For reasons known only to you, you feel you have to let him have his way in order to keep him. Don't be a door mat.

[COLOR="DarkOliveGreen"]You may be right. I came out later in life. It wasn't one of those things where I always knew but more one of those things where I always should have known but didn't (my first big crush was on a guy sitting across from me in a ceramics class when I was 14, yet I didn't put it all together till I was around 27 - not sure why, in hindsight, either). I reacted like I normally do to scary situations and did loads of research on the internet, reading stuff from well known gay bloggers like Dan Savage and a few other smaller gay guys as well.

Even now I am still learning. When I first posted this a week ago I thought the open relationship was something more common (or even default) to gay male relationships. I thought that is how gay guys were supposed to be, thus sort of talked myself in to it. That being open, sexually, with a partner was normal and I was weird for my misgivings. Internet research and going to gay clubs in my area did little to dispel that mythos. It is nice to get replies from other "old fashioned" types who seem to have these feelings too. Thanks, all, for the help. [/COLOR]