How do you deal with attention?

[Anocxu]

I am always genuinely flattered if I get attention. It's not often, plus my flirting technique with guys I like involves avoiding them as much as possible

So what you are saying is...

If a guy likes you..and you like him.. he has to chase you?

Well that's no fun..

[IanSaysHi]

Yes I am saying that.

[Darius]

Yes I am saying that.

Stop running so fast.

[Anocxu]

Yes I am saying that.

Aw..
Having a guy chase you can easily complicate what could be awesome experiences.

Now don't get me wrong..
I'm not judging you at all..
I have done the exact.

Let me give you an example...

I liked a guy..
He liked me..
I met him at a restaurant..
He was my waiter.
We chatted .. Had a lot in common.. I didn't think too much of it..

He saw me a few weeks later outside my job at the time, it turned out I worked about a half a mile from his house.

He comes by the recording dept at my job to say hello about twice a week..
Still didn't think too much of it..

Finally he asked me for my # ..
We eventually hung out alone..
He tells me he likes me..
I tell him the same..
We start hanging on a regular basis.

Well.. it turned out..
He was Bi..
Closeted..
Was experimenting sexually...
Had a girlfriend and wanted a boyfriend..

^^^^
I could have found all of this out sooner if I didn't play hard to get..

I pretty much wasted eight months to find out he was wrong for me..lol

I understand shyness.. and not being "easy"

My point...?
Engage..
See if he's right or wrong for you..
Make sure you're not wasting time or avoiding great moments...


:-P

[IanSaysHi]

I'm not playing hard to get intentionally... Far from it. Despite the copious advice I give others here about 'loving yourself to be loved', this is something I am still learning myself and most of the guys I find attractive make me think 'he's far too attractive to be interested in me', or I just don't think they'll be interested. But then, other times when I'm with friends or drunk or just having a good day, I'll maybe be a little more engaging. But no, I don't like the thrill of being chased as such (although flattering), rather just him making the first move means I know he's interested.

[Cridders88]

I'm not playing hard to get intentionally... Far from it. Despite the copious advice I give others here about 'loving yourself to be loved', this is something I am still learning myself and most of the guys I find attractive make me think 'he's far too attractive to be interested in me', or I just don't think they'll be interested. But then, other times when I'm with friends or drunk or just having a good day, I'll maybe be a little more engaging. But no, I don't like the thrill of being chased as such (although flattering), rather just him making the first move means I know he's interested.

Yes, this is me too. It's definitely a self confidence thing. I have frequently thought in the past "he is out of my league". It's not intentional that I don't do the chasing, it's just I often lack the self confidence to make the first move.

As for the broader topic as a whole, I'm not a person who craves attention. Sure, a little attention can be nice, but my shy nature often means I prefer to be "in the background".

[Anocxu]

I'm not playing hard to get intentionally... Far from it. Despite the copious advice I give others here about 'loving yourself to be loved', this is something I am still learning myself and most of the guys I find attractive make me think 'he's far too attractive to be interested in me', or I just don't think they'll be interested. But then, other times when I'm with friends or drunk or just having a good day, I'll maybe be a little more engaging. But no, I don't like the thrill of being chased as such (although flattering), rather just him making the first move means I know he's interested.

Ah..
Same here .. I don't play hard to get intentionally..
It seems to just happen.

I think we are alike in some aspects..

A guy literally has to look me in the eyes and say..
"Hey..I really..really..like you" until it registers.
Otherwise I won't know what to make of it...
In my mind i'm thinking..
He probably just wants to be good buds. .

Have I ever told you how much fun it is to be naive sometimes?

[Cobalt]

Not well, I hate it.

[Rod]

I'd rather not attract attention to myself. But i believe my face is cursed because people always ask me random questions in stores. CURSED BY THE RETAIL FACE OF "I KNOW IT ALL BUT DON'T WANNA BE BOTHERED"

"Whats the price of this product?"
"THE SAME PRICE AS YOUR HEAD ON A STAKE BETCH, NOW LET ME STOCK THIS SHELF."

[Darius]

Yes, this is me too. It's definitely a self confidence thing. I have frequently thought in the past "he is out of my league". It's not intentional that I don't do the chasing, it's just I often lack the self confidence to make the first move.

As for the broader topic as a whole, I'm not a person who craves attention. Sure, a little attention can be nice, but my shy nature often means I prefer to be "in the background".

I think I am pretty friendly and outgoing, by nature, but one thing that turns me off is someone who is aggressive with me. I'm not that way with others and I expect the same in return. The most comfortable friendships/relationships have come from a natural, easy going interaction from the beginning. That happens often, I find, except with people who have ulterior motives or who are looking for something more than just getting to know me for starters. Going slow is best, imo.