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LONDONERMilitarty joke
#1
Difference between an officer and an nco.

A young Naval officer was severely wounded in the head by a flight deck accident, but the only visible, permanent injury was that both of his ears were amputated.

Since his remaining hearing was sufficient, he remained in the Navy. Many years later he eventually rose to the rank of Rear Admiral. He was, however, very sensitive about
his appearance.

One day the Admiral was interviewing three servicemen who were candidates for his headquarters staff.

The first was a Marine Major, a helicopter pilot, and it was a great interview.

At the end of the interview the Admiral asked him, 'Do you notice anything different about me?' The young officer answered, 'Why, yes, Sir, I couldn't help but notice that you have no ears.'

The Admiral was displeased with his lack of tact and threw him out.

The second was with a Navy Lieutenant, and he was even better. The Admiral then asked him the same question, 'Do you notice anything different about me?'

He replied sheepishly, 'Well, sir, you have no ears.' The Admiral also threw him out.

The third interview was with an old Master Chief, an Airdale and staff-trained NCO.
He was smart, articulate, fit, looked sharp, and seemed to know more than the two officers combined.

The Admiral liked this guy, and went ahead with the same question, 'Do you notice anything different about me?'

To his surprise the Master Chief said, 'Yes, sir, you wear contact lenses.'

The Admiral was very impressed and thought, 'What an incredibly observant NCO, and he didn't mention my ears.' He asked, Master Chief, how do you know I wear contacts?'

“Well sir,' the salty old Master Chief replied, "it's pretty hard to wear glasses with no fuckin' ears!”
"You can be young without money but you can't be old without money"
Maggie the Cat from "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof." by Tennessee Williams
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