learning how to bottom at 62

[gentlebearDR62]

I only came ot 2 years ago,after 30 plus years of being married to a woman.I have been trying to learn how to bottom  (I am versatile}but want be able to enjoy the experience .being older its difficult to find mentors! GentlrBear

[Vermill10n]

It's easy - just use lot of lube and relax. 
It helps to be clean, so either you can douche (leave about an hour before sex) or go in the bath. 
Fingering first (you or your partner) can help, as well as rimming. Doing something that turns you on is also a good way to relax. Like if you enjoy giving oral sex, you could do that while your partner rims you before sex (like 69).


Ultimately, if it's your first time, it needs to go at your pace. If it's painful, you're not using enough lube or the top is going to fast - you need plenty lube and communication. You could try toys too - maybe you've used dildos before? If so, you could incorporate them.

Pain is generally due to tension - I've been with my top partner for 4 years and very occasionally I get pain when I'm stressed during sex. If I concentrate on muscles, i realise I'm tense. Sphincter is just a muscle, it needs to relax.
You also need a top who understands it's your first time.

Once you get past the worry, you will forget why you worried in the first place

My partner was able to make me cum hands-free from fucking once but he had come home from being out drinking (he takes a long time to cum when drunk) and it went on for a while. It was unusual and has never happened before (or since...). Generally, though, it will be much more intense if you come from masturbating while being fucked than simple masturbating, in my experience.